big.girls.dont.cry

2007-08-14T22:17:00.001+08:00

no time !!!! i got no time left... *gosh !
there i disappear again... *i hate this!

2007-08-10T21:24:00.000+08:00

went to study with zhiyong russh naqib guanghao today... it was really fun studying with them, though we didnt do must, except differentiation tutorials 1 and 2 :))

Guanghao is gentleman today, but russhy is not ! he bully me ! :(( we talk many tiny winy secrets... and it was great hanging out with them :)

thank you for today people ! loves loves loves ! :)))

gastric pain... terrible ! :( i didnt eat anything today, cos no appetite ! bad bad... must start to eat something ! :((

hahahahhahaah... you joker ! hahaha.... funny experience ! thank YOU !!

2007-08-09T13:10:00.000+08:00

i am sick... the pain is killing me and i just feel like vomitting always :( save me !

many things happened yesterday. had National day celebration in school, and i swear that the dance performance is nice! they can dance so well.. *jealous ! Nombo satu can sing ! not bad... *well done khairi :)) after which, we have a 2 hrs econs externalities "test" . its the most easiest test i have ever taken because we can actually discuss, talk, chit-chat as if its not a test. and most importantly, i didnt finish at all. i left the essay blank, cos i nve study at all. so forget it. just let that test fail :) then we had mojojo class. i didnt realli pay attention to him cos i was practically discussing and doing the chem bonding worksheet with zhiyong. *hack about mojojojo :p

then finally went shaun's place; played playstation 3, pool and ice-and-water where hariz amir arvin jee ron junkai lam kevan and i go so wacky and crazy. running everywhere.. laughing and shouting. haha:) once again, we are like small kids and we had lots of fun playing small children games :))) childhood revived ! <3>

pictures time :)

there's something wrong with my hp keypad. *so irritating; so annoying ! so people, if there's anything , just call me alrights ? *loves

private msgs to some :

**thank you hariz for the fun and tissue ytd. :) no worries about wanting to throw me into the pool. stay happy always :)) enjoyed myself teasing and disturbing you anyway. *haha <3

** russhy, thank you for your concern and accompany ytd. :) sorry if the vomit scene has scared you. haha :) yuppie. i'll take care of myself and get well soon :) you dont have t worry okay ? stay happy and that crazy always *heex <3

** lam, thank you for the fun times. and stop saving all my "iced" people. so irritating ! haha... :X more fun times okay ?? andd... tok to me if u need a listening ear :)) <3

** thank you shaun for "opening" ur house and allowing the class gathering to be a success :)) ur house realli lovely. i want to exchange house with you ! wakaka :)) anddd... u make delicious cheesecake !! :) try making chocolate cake for us next time :))

** JEE and yunyun : had lotsa fun with u guys ytd... more fun times okay ? love you girlfriends <3 align="center">** ron, thank you for the treat. andd... i had so much fun with you ytd. i think u have fun bullying me ytd too, right ? you seamonster.. go swim in ur sea! hahaha :) <3

** Guanghao, really ultra sad that u cant make it. but i really hope another outing is coming up, and i want you to be there alrights ? :) deal ? smile always ! :)))) tok to me if u got anything... <3

** nichelle, thank you for ur concern. ya... i am no longer emo. i'm a happy girl :)) miss you too ! meet up when i recover from sick okay ? its time to shop ... :) go save money first :)) cya soon <3

HIATUS ! love you boyfriends and girfriends !

2007-08-07T18:02:00.000+08:00

hello people :) sorry that i haven been blogging cos i'm soo tired and busy. school is a BORE to me, and i really cannot tahan any longer *carry on and i'll be die-ed. haha :)))
let's back-tracked about my life a little :)) *read onli if you are interested

found the link in my previous entry when i was blog-hopping a couple of days back. seriously, you guys wont believe that i actually teared when i read the blog. life is so fragile... i really hope the 3 lovely angelic babies are happy in their new world. :) *you should go check out*

I was SUPER ULTRA UPER low last friday after school. everyone knows it.. and heard from yunyun that everyone gathered and discussed what was wrong with me. haha *cute* i'm okay people... i know what is wrong with me, but i just dun wan to talk about it. when i feel like talking, i will say or maybe write here alrights ? :)) *anddd... its not about the FBT shorts :)

on saturday, paid 27 bucks to go macritchie reservoir to take photos. haha :) its really lame. luckily atiqa accompanied me, if not i'll die ! we lost my way ! we are like road idiots, duno where to alight and how to go. we end up walking a super long stretch of road beside the expressway. i think people must be thinking that we are mad; walking along the expressway early morning. haha :) but its okay... i had lotsa fun at the reservoir, where i am the model and aka is the photographer. i did many stupid poses and photos will be updated soon ! :)

sunday i was moody towards the end of the day, AT ORCHARD. this is the first time i felt moody at places like orchard. i duno why... brother's birthday at Jackplace's is a horrible mistake ! complains and dissatisfactions are made. hope they can improve themselves... anyway, i really hope brother will love the GOLDLION tie i bought for him, anddd... its not cheap okay ! :) *love you brother! <3

ytd is a long day... but actually it turned out to be quite fun :)) *i'm serious! mojojo class was best ! JEE and I were talking and laughing about him ; asking and going against him ; we are like rebellious girls in his class ! ahahah *right JEE ? :X i hope to have more bully class soon... cos he is so fun to be bullied :X *okay, i feel quite bad now. :p
then i went F&C with YUn and Jee.. ran 4rows non-stop + running ard the school circumference with Guanghao and ron. *guanghao, you can really run. i will die if i run another row with you. :))) i'm tired and lack of energy, but i reali love their company wen i was running. so fun to hang out with them :) *thanks guys. love you :)))

today is a restless day. i tried to perk myself up in the morning, but cant. i had stomach discomfort since last night. argh* :( not the berak kind, but the painful kind. maybe i'm dying ? hahahah :)) i was down earlier in the day, but manage to pull myself up :))) everything turns out fine , luckily :) Ronald is a ultra big bully, and Guanghao too ! guanghao is not gentle-man. he always hit me... *you are not suppsoed to hit me, Mr GH !!! hahahah... not gentle-man at all ! i go tell blader girl :p :p :p

guanghao "sexy back" hhahaha :))

lastly, i love my girlfriends and i enjoy their company like nobody business :) * love you girlfriends!

taggies reply :
*yun : mojojojo class is fun right ? sorry that JEE and i sat together, while yo usat with weiting, which you have no fun at all. feel bad about that. next time you sit when jee, and i sit alone okay ? i'm okay with it, cos mojojojo like me. so he will entertain me even if i'm sitting alone :))

*JEE : you're most welcome. thank you for making laugh and go mad like a crazy girl everyday single sec min and day. haha :) more fun in mojojojo class, bullying and laughing at him alrights ? love you sweets :)

** to GH: thank you for everything, and i nve anyhow write okay ! cheer up and work on ur flying skills... stop hitting me, you ungentle-man :)) wakaka :) smile always! alrights ? anything can talk to me if you need to, including ur dream girl *heex*

2007-08-03T15:31:00.000+08:00

seriously touched and saddened by this...
http://www.ashleyisourangel.blogspot.com/

bless baby Ashley Joash and Nathaniel...

2007-08-02T21:14:00.000+08:00

what else can i say when i got all my beloved girlfriends and boyfriends ard me ?

all i can say is...

"i am happy with them, and life is great evolving ard them everyday, every single sec and min " :))) *i love you girlfriends and boyfriends* this is the reason why i dont need a boyfriend or an eye-candy. :))))

had netball today, and i love today cos its super slack. most of them got trials for funfestique. dora shermaine jolin and maryanne went to the film wateva trial... leaving me and ju alone. :X but nvm.. we managed to talk crap and joke to pass the time :p *i love ju*

after which, i went white sands to bubble with liting and kangli. they are foreva so crazy and siaosiao!! haha... :)) i love hanging out with them , loving them always.

okay, then i started sending random smses to all my loved ones. **people i am serious and super sincere about the content of the sms okay. i type every single sms, and its all different from the rest alright. :) *those who did not receive my love sms, dun be sad. u are not forgotten. i stil love u as much as i love others.

*JEE

*Yun

*Ron

*Russh

*Liting

*Mel

*Jade

*fatty brother

*Sy

*Kim

*Junaidah

*Aka

those who want me to send love smses, tag me ! :)) if you are worth my love, i will def send you some! wakakaka <3

lastly, i am really happy now. and people, do keep urself updated, esp junkai ron russh and guanghao. the latest news for me is : manager and mich. NOT momok lee and me. i divorce him alrdy. wakaka. :p :p no more nombo satu and round*. its the past !! buttt, i dun mind u guys continuing saying roundstar and me OR manager and me ! :))

you're loved !

and hope you enjoy this full-of-love entry !

momok lee lesson tmr... *hmmm what do you think! wow~~ wakakak .. joker!!!

*NaJihan... dont do this for SPA okay? hahahahaha :)))

2007-07-28T22:59:00.000+08:00

people, the girlfriends, lovies and besties, I AM BACK ! :) yes... the cheerful hyper and cheerful mich is back ! :)))

today is college day, and it is my revived day. i had lotsa fun with my girlfriends and i reallllllllllliiiiiiiiii love them a lot. they made my day, able me to be happy again! :) once again, i lead my life like a 5year ols kid, laughing, playing, joking, going crazy today ! :) i love the feeling! and the feeling is back ! the next ting to do is my promos ! :) i am confident that i can do it, cos nth is impossible, unless you make it impossible ! so all my darlings, lets work hard and get promtoed tgt... no one is to be left behind ! 07S211 will promoted as ONE !! :)))

let's backtracked a little. i feel a little blissed nowadays. why ? i am quite happy cos i see many scenes which made me smile out of the blue. let's tok about it... :)

scene 1: i saw a mom alighting from a bus, where her husband and 2 year old daughter were waiting for her at the bus stop, tries to hide from her daughter. she hid behind a pillar, and her daughter was looking all over, and when her mom appear, she lits up IMMEDIATELY. i simply can feel the little girl's happiness; happy to see her mom again... adorable ! it brightens my day when i saw the scene.. :)

scene 2: while teaching my kid, valan, he joked and played with me. his thinking is sooo simple, that i couldnt stop laughing at the slightest move, blurness or words he said or committed. he is so cute and naughty that makes me want to love him more, and sayang him and cant bear to give him hw. i love it when he argues, saying "tomorrow you coming, so cannot give me hw. you cannot give me la... cannot cannot cannot ! hey.. so unfair... you coming tmr, i no time.. etc" he actually argues and wishes that i dont give him hw.. and when i said, "okay. no hw... give you time to relax or play..." he smiled till as if i have given him a pile of new toys, when all i did was simply saying "no hw". innocent thinking is a blissed. i love my little valan ! :)

scene 3: i feel so fortunate when my second kid, alanna, actually start to open up to me, and willing to joke and play with me. she used to be quiet and obedient, now she has started to use words like "lame shit" "not funny" "irritating"... and laughing more to me. i feel so happy whenever she laughs and smiles to me. she brings happiness to me and make me forget my troubles. what pleases me most is when she remembers what i teach her, and never disappoint me. thank you my dearest alanna...

scene 4: looking at 2 kids, with their grandmother boarding the bus where their grandmother feels a little embarrassed because her grandchildren are so noisy in the bus. however, when i look at the kids, a smile lits on my face. i find them so naive and innocent, so adorable and simple-minded that they dont know anything about pride. what they think is to entertain themselves and have fun... nothing is more important than that... i love their simplicity !

kids... kids... kids... they simply brighten my day, just like what chocolates does ! :))

today i revived. i realised i love my mom, more than i think. i love my grandparents more than i know. and i love all the girlfriends more than i feel. :) i finally found the reason to live and to stay happy :)) it is them who i love and cant live without. :))

pictures speak louder than words, so look at it and judge ! :)

Mr Jason Ong whom i should usher, but didnt come

Mr Christopher Silva, whom i should usher too, but nve come

the crazy cindy and me :p :p
cindy and me again :)) *i love her lots

collage of my fun times :) *love all of them <3

i heart her ; joanna and me <3>my best VIP buddy, nani and me :))
our crazy times; our crazy faces :X
when i go hyper *hahahaha :p :p
when we get to eat after looking at the food for 120 mins

another collage ; i love the girlfriends <3>
me, yunzhi and yunyun <3
craziness just started *wakakak ; all yunyun's fault :))
i really love her a lot; yunzhi(amanda) and me
siaosiao times *hahahah :p :p

the new meridian leaders board is up ! and i caught and snapped some beautiful pictures of our classmates... :) check out how unglam they are ! wakaka :p :p

our dear guang hao, saying hi to? (ant*, blader or netball girl? ) :p
our volleyball captain, Lam PeiXian :))
devotee to guitar , Guan Zhi Yong
callisto captain, Kevan Lee *move it move it*

okay, that's all i have for today :) hope you guys enjoy and love this revival post ! haha :p

**my beloved JEE, i suddenly miss you a lot ! i cant wait to see you on monday !!! :) more fun times ahead okay ? we shall get back to how we used to; write love letters in class and lectures + go crazy and joke about mojojo *hmmm... what do you think* + talk about faufau + MIA from her + scout for new eye-candy cos i think its time to change (ours are too rusty alrdy), need to update and upgrade :))) + go bubbling often (chocomint, rmb?) :)) + bully yunyun + study tgt + go parkway + take photos .. .etc ... :) okay sweetheart ??

*** yunyun, thank you for being there for me always ! you nve fail to appear ard me, just like a hantu... haha. you and momok lee can be tgt !! hahaha... :p since jee and i are changing eye-candy alrdy, do you want to join ? you seriously need to change, cos yours have alrdy rust with shit on it *no offence* haha :))) just joking ! seriously, you are constantly there for me; happy sad moody dying, anytime. thanks a lot ! :) i had lotsa fun with you today, and i am realli looking forward to more ! let's go out one day.. woohoo ~~ cya soon! :))))

2007-07-26T21:37:00.000+08:00

today is an emo day;

its a day that i dont feel like opening my mouth.

I was really quiet like shit, that it seems like i am angry or sad or whatever.

i dont know why i feel that way, but all i knew is that i dont feel like talking much.

i just want to keep quiet and look at people, or let people do the talking.

i dont want and dont wish to open my mouth and say something.

sorry girls, if you guys were worried about me.

i am really okay, or maybe not?

i myself is confuse seriously...

let me have some time to think about it okay ?

i may not know the answer now,

but i promise i will find out,

and let the girlfriends know when i am ready...

~~what am i feeling today ?~~

~~i feel terribly emotionless today !~~

~~i feel terrible right now !~~

~~i cant breathe !~~

~~i am restless... and tired.~~

2007-07-24T21:14:00.000+08:00

posted in there... no mood for here (i am sad again, seriously)

(if you know what i mean; if not, too bad ! )

2007-07-21T16:45:00.000+08:00

things i am in seach for...

2007-07-21T12:28:00.000+08:00

if i am lost for a day; try and find me

but if i don't come back, then i won't look behind me

all of the things that i thought were so easy

just got harder and harder each day

december is the darkest and june is the light

but this empty bedroom won't make anything right

while out on the landing a friend i forgot to send home

who waits up for me all through the night

i dreamed i was dying; as i so often do

and when i awoke i was sure it was true

i ran to the window; threw my head to the sky

and said whoever is up there,

please don't let me die

but i can't live forever,i can't always breathe

one day i'll be sand on a beach by a sea

the pages keep turning, i'll mark off each day with a cross

and i'll laugh about all that we've lost

january,february,march,april,may i'm alive

june,july,august,september,october i'm alive

november,december,yah all through winter,

i'm alive

2007-07-19T22:43:00.000+08:00

i wont be saying much about my life in here for the time being, cos i think what aka said is right. i need some time alone,and some time off from the world. i am currently carrying the whole world on my shoulder. i got simply too many things to handle that i couldnt really breathe. i think stress, burdens, responsibilities are suffocating me now. i am trying to be a good daughter(to substitute my elder bro role), good sister, good fren, good student,good example,good tutor,good pianist,good girl... trying my best to fulfil all the roles. roundstar is the past(i think), so no more bring a good "eyecandier"...

*jee,haha.you once said its kind of impossible for a girl to w/o an eyecandy, right? wakaka... i am one such girl now;a unique and special one. seriously no eyecandy so far.maybe next time :)*

i am looking for the following clothes. if you do notice and its at reasonable $$, please call or sms me STRAIGHT cos i desperately want to shop and spend money to relieve my stress ! thank you... *loves*

cheap.grey.skinny.jeans
the.jacket
the.white.dress(preferably sleeveless,but with the bottom looking like that)
the.dress.and.jacket.above
the.transparent.top.1
the.transparent.top.2
the.white.top
the.top.i.love.most ! (first priority! find this first!!)
cheap.long.black.leggings

for the time being, dont have to worry about me. i will try to cope things well... wont suffer from depression :) have fun, and continue to smile ! :)) *lovies* thank you for understanding, and concerning.

2007-07-18T20:09:00.000+08:00

what my friendster horoscope said today is super true :

There's more to life than being attractive! Don't get caught up in shallow beauty.
There is so much more to life than being attractive, so try not to get too caught up in the culture of beauty. You are already a beautiful person inside and out -- the people who choose to be in your life can tell you that any time you need them too. The faces you see on the magazine covers are airbrushed beyond all recognition, so holding yourself up to those types of standards is ridiculous! Oh, and you know what's also ridiculous? People who think that looking good is all it takes to be good.

2007-07-18T15:25:00.000+08:00

i wanna skip school today cos i dont have the mood for anything recently. just want to lead a dead life... but thanks to rona nd russh for cheering me up at the end of the day :) *thanks guys ! lovesloves *

I could sit in this house

In this room, In this bed

Just as long as I'm feeling this way

I just lay here trying to deal with this pain

Four walls and no you (wow)

The silence in this room is so loud

No one else can fix it but you

I've been trying

To put the pieces of a picture

Back together

But it just dont look the same

(I feel sick I need a medic) Cause my heart's stopped beating

And I feel like I'm slipping away

And I don't know how

I'm gonna make it

I'm going crazy

But maybe somehow

You can find your way

*lam : thanks ! i am okay :) you dont tired yourself too much ... :) take care

*JEE and Yun : jee glad that u are okay. but i somehow feel and know that you are troubled. its okay... say it when u are ready , or tok to ur close friends okay ? dont bottled up :) thanks JEE and Yun . i'm okay... no worries :) smile ! cya in school...

2007-07-16T23:12:00.000+08:00

my comp has revived :) *happy*

i feel really low today. and i mean, really ultra low. i dont know why. i tried to act okay in school, but there's time where i show my sad emotions. i dont why... i just feel so so so emo today... :( maybe i need some time alone after bring so crazy for the past few days. afterall, there are many things i cant share or say out. i am sad... :( anddd... i am really worn out. i am trying to hold on... so tired ~~

embun di pagi buta

menebarkan bau asa

detik demi detik ku hitung

inikah saat ku pergi

oh Tuhan ku cinta dia

berikanlah aku hidup

takkan ku sakiti dia

hukum aku bila terjadi

aku tak mudah mencintai

aku tak mudah mengaku ku cinta

aku tak mudah mengatakan

aku jatuh cinta

senandungku hanya untuk cinta

tirakatku hanya untuk engkau

tiada dusta sumpah ku cinta

sampai ku menutup mata

cintaku sampai ku menutup mata

oh Tuhan ku cinta dia

berikanlah aku hidup

takkan ku sakiti dia

hukum aku bila terjadi

2007-07-12T16:42:00.000+08:00

songs can represent how i feel sometimes... cos they are my voice; telling and singing to everyone about my feeling ... (if you are interested)

I'm not the type to get my heart broken

I'm not the type to get upset and cry

'Cos I never leave my heart open

Never hurts me to say goodbye

Relationships don't get deep to me

Never got the whole in love thing

And someone can say they loved me truly

But at the time it didnt mean a thing

My mind is gone

I'm spinning round

And deep inside

My tears ill drown

I'm loosing grip

What's happening?

I stray from love

This is how I feel

This time was different

Felt like I was just a victim

And it cut me like a knife

When you walked out of my life

Now I'm in this condition

And I got all the symptoms

Of a girl with a broken heart

But no matter what

You'll never see me cry

Did it happen when we first kiss?

Cos it's hurting me to let it go

Maybe cos we spent so much time

And I know that is no more

I should have never let you hold me baby

Maybe why i'm sad to see us apart

I didn't give it to you on purpose

can't figure out how you stole my heart

My mind is gone
I'm spinning round
And deep inside
My tears ill drown
I'm loosing grip
What's happening?
I stray from love
This is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm in this condition
And I got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what
You'll never see me cry

How did I get here with you

I'll never know

I never meant to let it get so personal

And after all I tried to do

To stay away from love with you

I'm broken-hearted

I can't let you know

And I won't let it show

You won't see me cry

This time was different

Felt like I was just a victim

And it cut me like a knife

When you walked out of my life

Now I'm in this condition

And I got all the symptoms

Of a girl with a broken heart

But no matter what

You'll never see me cry

all my life... ...

2007-07-09T12:49:00.000+08:00

couple of minutes ago, roundstar is beside me, soooo close ! Ohmygod !! :)) okay, i am going insane soon ! :p :p i want roundstar to be by my side again, and talk to me!! *ultra.high*

got back GP jus now, and reali glad that i pass GP, with an E. :)) *relieved* next paper is econs and maths. hopefully i can pass. :p :p

one main focus today :

I MISS YOU SO MUCH NOW !!
CAN YOU MOVE BACK ??
I MISS YOU !!!!!!! :(

YOU=brother

2007-07-08T01:30:00.000+08:00

i feel ultra sad now :((

It's funny how you think you really know yourself

Like you would never lose yourself to someone else

And I was up to thinking it was all about you and me

Silly silly meI should have never listened to a word you said

But I was always giving in to promises

I never should have gone for

I should never long for you no matter how hard it gets

And I want this to be over

I so want this to be through

In the end somehow it always comes back to you

Cause everywhere I go

No matter what I do boy

I just can't get you out of my head

So it annoys me

(You wasn't man enough)

To come and tell me

(That I was never the one)

Like you said I was

(You could have told someone)

You knew you didn't love me anymore

If you had only told me how you really felt

I could have put my feelings into someone else

But I was busy thinkin' I was where I was supposed to be

Silly silly me

But there was something 'bout you that I couldn't resist

Can't put my finger on it but whatever it is

I never should have stood for it

I know you're no good for me

And that's the way it is

And I want it to be over

I so want it to be through

In the end somehow it always comes back to you

Cause everywhere I go

No matter what I do boy

I just can't get you out of my head

So it annoys me

(You wasn't man enough)

To come and tell me

(That I was never the one)

Like you said I was

(You could have told someone)

You knew you didn't love me anymore

tell myself

Get over you

It's over right

Right thing to do

And just when I thought I was done

You pull me in for another run

I can't take this

I won't take this

I can't do this

I Won't do it

Even if I know in the end somehow it always comes back to you

Cause everywhere I go

No matter what I do boy

I just can't get you out of my head

So it annoys me

(You wasn't man enough)

To come and tell me

(That I was never the one)

Like you said I was

(You could have told someone)

You knew you didn't love me anymore

2007-07-08T00:39:00.000+08:00

the weekends are here. . . and i think its an awful one cos i didnt get to see him ytd, plus i didnt buy anything except for a tube today ! :( but nvm. . . i love the tube anyway ! i went the new shopping mall (Central) at clarke quay with my borther and nichelle. its horrilbe ! so people, dun waste your time ! :)) after so, we went to vivo. they left at about 830pm, when i start shopping myself there cos i dun wan to go home so earli. yup. . . i then bought a tube from Pull and Bear for $34.90. i am poorer now. wakaka :p anyway, i'm going to buy the shoes from River Island next weekend. i cant let the beautiful shoes slip away. ;)))

today there was so many handsome and tanned guys ard me. i am so honoured; in mrt, vivo and bus. woohoo~ :))) anyway, anyone go shopping with me next week ??? book me. . . hahah :p

school for the last 2 days are interesting cos the Fauzana nve come school. and we have sooooo many free periods. but i doubt school will be fun from monday onwards. but its alright its okay cos i get to see round* and my lovies :))))) hopefully maths gp and econs results will be good good !! *prayhard*

going to be a busy month for me... i gotta do well for my piano exams, and i am not practising. s*** !! work hard. . . practise everyday !! :)))

*** kayaking on 4august ! woohoo~~~ :X ***

** Did I ever do anything that was this cruel to you?

Did I ever make you wonder who was standing in the room?

You made yourself look perfect in everyway,

So when this goes down,

I'm the one that will be blamed.

Your plan is working so you can just walk away,

Baby your secret's safe.

**The more you try to tell me that you changed

the more i feel neglected

if this is how you try to make it up to me then let's just end it

I dont, like this feeling any more

I dont, like this feeling

cause whenever i'm around you boy i know that i won't be respected

just neglected

**i can't wait to fall in love with you

you can't wait to fall in love with me

this just can't be summer love, you'll see

this just can't be summer love (l-o-v-e)

**There's one thing I want to say so I'll be brave

You were what I wanted, I gave what I gave

I'm not sorry I met you

I'm not sorry it's over

I'm not sorry there's nothing to save

*taggies reply :

ahboy : heyhey !! surprise to see ur tag. :) sure. if you got any prob, can stil come find me, even rship prob. :p wakaka

JEE : funny right ? but... haix. i think its over. :(((

Yun : lard is bad; ghee is good. wakakak :)))

lam : you're welcome... hope you enjoyed ur day with SPECIAL one that day :))) loves

2007-07-06T09:09:00.000+08:00

the weekends are tomorrow ! woohoo ~~ ;) i simply love saturdays and sundays, but i LOVE public holidays more ! :)))) * another LOVE *

alrighty. . . lets talk about a day which i dont mind dying after it, YESTERDAY ! i am super ultra high ytd cos i bump into him for 247951292633 times !!!! *excited* can you believe it ? the first lesson(physics), i was in his home room (E4-*) and i saw many pics of him. hey ppl, he's is super adorable okay !! i admit i reali got the urge to steal one of the pics cos its so IRRESISTABLE !!! wakaka ~

then i saw his back view at 3rd floor after recess + saw his again in e3-* AGAIN!!! thenthenthen... we were sooooooo close outside the toilet ! we went to the toilet with burok, and i saw him !! he was reali adorble and handsome !!! *i.am.going.crazy*

the CLIMAX, i actually took the same bus with him home. he was reali ADORABLE !!!!!!!! *oh.my-god.somebody.save.me* he was behind me and i was so tense up the whole trip alright !! can you imagine that i actually bump into him for soooo many times !!! i am really happy and dont mind dying becos of him... wakaka ~~ :p :p :p

okay.okay... *control.urself.mich* hahahahahahahah . back to reality! *dont.ask.or.wish.for.the.impossible* i got 23/100 for physics ! bloody section B that pull me down like nobody's business. seriously, i was quite sad for the result, but what can i do ? jus accept it then :( haix !! went bubbling with JEE, and its was fun !! we talk everything under the sun moon stars clouds rainbow rain... *i.am.mad.again*

tuition with valan is fun and enjoyable too. . . cos we are ahead of what his school is teaching, we slack a little ytd. we went through the science encylobidia(duno how to spell) about plants and animals. it was freaking interesting cos we get to see the pictures of different insects and stuffs. :p the most happy part is the i got my first tuition fee ytd(though.its.50%.of.it.for.the.first.mth.only) . i am $80 richer today :)) having another tutoring session today at 7pm. hope it'll be as fun as valan !! ;)

okay... that's my life for this 2 days !! going somewhere tomorrow. . . hopefully everything wil be settled tomorrow. . . :)) cya people !!

** specially to LAM PEIXIAN ; HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you !!! are you loving S211 and mich more after today ??? dont deny if you do ya. . . haha !!! enjoy ur day alright ??? dun midd me ... wakakaka

2007-07-04T14:32:00.000+08:00

today is the last day for the long break ! :(( i want longer and more holidays !!!!!!!! *roars*
i didnt make full use of this holidays cos i didnt reali go shopping. i only buy 1 top from ZARA. *CAN YOU BELIEVE?!!!!!!! onli one top * gosh...imust reali go shopping soon again, cos my wardrode is lacking of clothes ;))

about the friends problem, i stil cant bring myself to trust someone deep enough like the past. i think it hurt me a lot this time round. . . nvm ! i gotta be independent :)

i had a long bonding session with my mom and elder brother ytd, till this morning 4am. i love talking and cuddling by my elder brother side cos i feel like a little girl once again. <3>

he loves me a lot
he dotes on me a lot
but he vanished suddenly
i miss him like crazy sometimes
that i cried at night
i miss having someone who loves me
and pay his full sttention to me
and give me money whenever i going out with my friends
and ask "you got enough money ?"
"have you eaten?"
"want to eat anything?"
"you want what daddy buy for you"
i feel super sad when people told me what their dad bought for them
though their parents have divorce or separated
i feel super low whenever my friends get whatever they want
from their dad
i got nothing from my dad
because he is gone
he has disappeared
i feel sad losing an addition person
to love dotes and buy whatever i want
the pain you can never understand
i have to pay for everything myself
no one buy shoes bag clothes for me
i feel sad :(

aiyoyo. . . what's with me ? so emo... haha. lets be random. lets talk about what i love...

i LOVE RAINY days
i love the SUN, sometimes
i love RAINBOW (no one knows)
i love ICE/WINTER a lot !!
i LOVE my MOM and 2 BROTHERS like mad
i LOVE CHOCOLATES like otak cacat
sometimes i miss my dad
i LOVE hanging out with nichelle
i love fruits, esp STRAWBERRY and CHERRY
i LOVE CHEESEcake
i love WHITE BLACK GREEN BROWN
i LOVE SLACKING alone, or with close friends

i am crazy in LOVE with SHOPPING !!!
i love to buy sleeveless TOPS mini SKIRTS and SHORTS
i am in LOVE with JEANS recently
i LOVE LAVENDER and MOONFLOWER
i LOVE SUNFLOWER and BLUE ROSES
i love to let my hair down
i love shopping ALONE sometimes
i LOVE to drink ALCOHOL or hot/cold CHOCOALTE
i love my friends a lot that sometimes i dont even know it
i love wearing long necklaces and ring
i LOVE wisma taka and far east
i am in LOVE with forever 21, ZARA, Bebe, topshop
i love to look at guys, esp HANDSOME NAUGHTY guys
i love to look at girls dressing sense, and COMMENT on them at times

i LOVE to be ALONE sometimes
i love it when people ask for my number
i love it when i hear from my brother or friends that someone say i am PRETTY/CUTE
i am madly in LOVE with POSITIVE comments <3
i LOVE peeping and seeing ROUNDSTAR*
i LOVE to be in LOVE and in a RELATIONSHIP

okay. . . so far that's all about my LOVES !! :)) seeyou soon, seeyou tomorrow !!!

<3>

2007-07-01T19:28:00.000+08:00
mids are over and i am so happy cos i can finally slp in peace and feel no stress anymore ! :)) mids sucks alright. . . chemistry are moving like bullet-train cos we got to keep rushing for time *wth* i screwed up for econs essay cos my mind went blank half-way :((( physics=fail for sure! :p maths is ok, but i think i did quite a number of mistakes here and here... *arghhh* nvm.. what done has been done, so i dun care ! let's enjoy the holz now !!!!!!!!!! :)))

okay... i am lost and confuse cos i duno what i wan in life now. . . jus a random post. . .

what is friendship? can friendship really last ? i am in doubt for weeks. . .

friend 1 :
it seems like i am insignificant to whom-i-call-them-best-friends friends . . . come to me when youneed help, and once the matter is settled, u go abt telling me how happy and great you feel. . . thought of my feelings before ? and yes. . . no longer care about my feelings and situation i faced. if that's how u react, i got nothing to say. ** I am quite disappointed with YOU **

friend2:
i didnt know ppl think and see me in this way. yes, who cares about what they say , but can you really not care about it? haha. . . well, i seriously dont knoe what to say to you, but all i want is some time by myself. . . be with those friends of yours, and share with them our situation then. and let them say more things about me. . . cos you knoe something ? i wont be surprise with whatever they say anymore, cos i finally see through them. . . ** i am hurt by YOU that day **

friend 3:
i think tat we are nothing but just hanging and having fun friends. dun tell me how great and popular you are with guys. so what if you are ?? you think i will be jealous cos there aint much guys wooing me in JC as compared to you ? you know something ? i dont a freaking damn about ur guys-and-love life, cos its your problem. so stop telling and boosting how popular you are . . . cos it irks me ! and i am disgusted by YOU !
what are friendship ? i have learnt something from this holz : dont trust anyone ! so i am not going to trust anyone anymore, cos it hurts to trust someone so much then the next min the person hurt you like hell. . .

**a stranger in my life ;; its time to be a big girl now,and big girls dont cry

2007-06-14T14:36:00.000+08:00
hellos people !!
today i am the happiest girl the world. . . why ? cos i added round* ytd and he accepted me today . . . thanks JEE and Yunyun for teasing me "recently added fren" yea ?! wakakak :p :p irritating ! JEE i so going to tease u and *ahem* till u beg and plead me not to tease anymore. wakaka :)))) i think i'm mad and crazy over the adorable round* . . . hoping for a miracle !!! *praypraypray*

okie. . . lets talk abt my hols. . . or rather my prison life. . . no holz at all !! my schedule for everyday is EAT, SLP. STUDY, BERAK, WATCH TV . . . SLP, STUDY, STONE, WATCH DVD. . . EAT, SLP, STONE, ROT . . . shocking eh ? wakaka . . yup ! thats my life for the past 3 weeks. . . gosh ! its GSS period and i didnt reali go shopping, onli twice. but . . . beta than nth cos at least i enjoyed the 2 trips. . . :))) first time i went with mommy and i bought a Dorethy Perkins cute green dress. . . *loves* and a blue top from topshop. i saw a ring which is so adorable and pretty and its onli 10 bucks. . . but my mom doesnt wan to buy for me !!! *roars* i was seriously angry with her at that point of time, but nvm . . cos at least she bought for me the green dress ! *love ya mom*

second time was ytd. . . went bugis with JEE . . . i love hanging out with her cos she is so funni and crazy !! oh ya. . . JEE got herself a POSB card (finally) !! wakaka. . . yup . . . with my help . . . we went to look for the pathetic POSB/DSB bank to withdraw money and she found it ! :))) i think she is reali happy now cos she can withdraw money anywhere. . . right jee ?? but dun anyhow spend , and you've yet to transfer 3000 bucks to my acc . . . *i'm waiting* plus, u owe that customer service aunty money too ! u have to transfer. . she's waitin ! :p anyway, we went teenage cafe . . . and we walked bugis street for like 2486913813 times, searching for nice frame specs and my black skinny jeans. . . we cant find the specs but i got my jeans after soooo long of walking the same place.

* JEE, i wan the specs cos we gotta carry out our plan- to wear specs on the first day of exams together . remember ? that 78 bucks specs is nice . . . :p :p

abt me, been coughing for the past 2 weeks. . . stil haven ok . . :( i think i'm dying, with lung cancer. hahahaha :) sobx sobx . . . i think i'm mad ! wakaka . . . if dying is that easy . . . i'll be happy ! :((

okie. . . exams is in one week time. . . and i haven start econs. . . *arghh! so many to study . . i wan quit sch, find a rich handsome guy/handsome sugar daddy and marry . . . be a full-time young taitai . . . wakaka !! i hate studying!! :X

alrighty . . . that's all that happen to me for the past 3 weeks. . . studying with lam, junkai, jee and yun is fun !! :) it'll be beta if round* study with me, or sit beside me and guide me in my studies. . . woohoo !!!! woolala. . .

I AM SO HAPPY AND FEELING HIGH NOW !!! but i dun have high hopes cos i dun wan to feel sad in the end . .

2007-06-01T17:02:00.001+08:00

okie. . here's some pictures i taken for my disappearance for few weeks. . . :)) 07S211 learning journey to Fort Canning Park, but having a pizza treat from Miss Fauzana in school first :)))

yeah i got a hp !!! :p :p
some lame things s211 loves to do
Miss fauzana
we need some chilling !!
guanghao and me
07S211 loves
pretty us <3
Fort Canning Centre
Lam and me

simplicity me !! :))
greedy ronald, eating the 7th piece

Mr Zhiyong
the amount of pizza the boys managed to sqeeuze into their stomachs

yunyun and me
jee and mich
the runaway russh *wakakak*

hope you enjoy viewing !! tag me if you wan . . waiting for your taggies !! :))) *loves*

2007-06-01T16:10:00.000+08:00
HAPPY 1st JUNE people !! :D kiss goodbye to may, and Hellos to June !!! wakakaka :p

i am JEE's house and her house doesnt look like malay house can . . . :))
i used the comp the whole day though we are supposed to "study" hahahaha :))) uploaded some pics in my frenster and yes. . . i have the courage to face the reality already, becos i am back to blogging and i've entered frenster again, after sooooo long. :)) thanks to jee for being there for me always. *lovesloves*

i am over him and i am so carefree... woohoo !! btw, i did something brave today. . . i viewed kbox and roundstar profile jus now !! i realised kbox loves chocolates and roundstar loves to slack. i love both chocolates and slacking. . . wakakak :p OMG !!! i am going mad. . . and according to Miss Jee, she said i am very crazy and siao today . . . *pergi mampos la JEE* i think both the otak cacat person in our life boleh relek one corner sua. . . right ?? you know who i am refering !!! :)))) oh yes. . . jee taught me some commonly used malay words and i am getting to the hang of it. . . right jee ?? wakakaka :)))

i am hoping they do something, pretty plss.. . . . . :)) i gotta study soon !!! yeah. . .
SHOPPING SHOPPING SHOPPING !!!!!!! i wan to SHOP !!!!!!!!

**Lam : yes. . . i would love to go shopping with you . . . when when when ? i can choose nice clothes for you. . . my taste not bad !! wakakaak :)))
**JEE : yesh . . i am back to the virtual world. all thanks to you JEE !! :)) i love where i am now, and i am crazy with you. hahaha :)) more fun times okie ??

2007-05-30T12:39:00.000+08:00
hellos people !! i'm back to blogging, and i know you guys miss me lots right ? haha. . . cos yun, lam, jee have been asking me to blog blog blog. . . so here's another entry ! wakaka :))

many things happen this few weeks. . . but i can say mostly are happy things cos i spend most of my time with crazy ppl like S211, JEE and yunyun. . . :))) *loves* they never fail to brighten my days with their random-ness, lame jokes and silly actions. . . i simply love S211, and i am happy to be in this class !! woohoo ~ :D

studies are getting on hand and i manage to do ok-ok for all my tests . . . i got a D for chemistry atomic struture test, which i am so happy !! *hoorayyy!!* for once in my whole life that i find the alphebet "D" is lovely and nice to look at. wakakaka :p jee, dun worry . . . you will definitely pass for mid-years. . remember, enjoy the process and not the destination !! :)) always here for you. . .

personal life, i am really elated that i've FINALLY GOT OVER HIM !!!! yes. . . him (those who duno, too bad. . . ) i dun miss , think or even contact him anymore ! i manage to cross this hurdle with JEE encouragement. thanks babe !! :) what enlightens me ? i myself also duno . . . i wanna move on and have fun with my lovies and not feel sad and troubled because of someone who WILL NOT DO ANYTHING BUT JUST AVOID AND ESCAPE ! yup . . . i am free and happy now !! wakakaka. . . :)) Mich is independent and i can survive !!! :)))

june holz are here and i feel must relieved cos i dun have to attend school everyday. . . but i gota study at home for mid-years. :( nvm. . . i will get good grades for mid-years !!! *chiong all the way mich* GP exams is gone, and i think its quite alright. hopefully i can get at least a pass ?? wakakak . . . :p

okie. . . back-track a lil . . . on monday we had learning journey at FCpark . . and its a nice and educational place, minus the heat and moquitoes ! :X pictures cant be uploaded . . . but u can view them at JEE's blog (www.squeeze-me.blogspot.com) . . . i had pizza for lunch, treated by Miss Fauzana. i miss pizza so much cos i haven have them for ages. . . *yummmmmy*

soccer finals was a lil sad cos MJ lost to RJ by a score of 0-1. but but but. . . its ok its alright. . what matters is they did their very best . . . 2nd placing is beta than 3rd placing right ? remaining at 2nd place is beta than dropping down to lower placing right ? :) we should be contented with the results and whateva we have (good soccer players and coach) *loves*

my piano internal exam is approaching soon . . . i am reali scared cos i haven got the speed for scales and my scales sucks !!! *panick panick* hopefully i can do well for internal, but i stil got 1 mth for the real external paino exams. . . i wish by then i would have master the scales at my fingertips and playing it sooo well !!! i love sight-reading and the piano piece B2. . . i wanna score on them !!! wish me luck ppl. . . itson 5 june, tues !! woohoo. . :)))

for now, i am practising and practising piano everyday. . . and my skin are peeling due to sun-tanning. . .hope it;ll be done with the peeling soon . . . . . .. cos its so ITCHY !!!!! but i love the tanlines. . . haha !!

RED ALERT !!!!
shopping people/girls ?? anyone wan to shopping ? if yes, ask me along !! c'mon . . . its Great Singaproe Sales + June Holidays. .. you gotta enjoy and shop till you drop dead. . . wakaka ! :)) call, sms, or tag me if you guys wan go shopping okie ?? i'll be waiting. . . *loves + kisses*

*i am so over you and i am happy with the way i am . . .

2007-05-16T12:49:00.000+08:00
i wont be blogging for some time cos i no mood for anything. . . you can still tag me and i'll try to reply when i'm in a mood for anything. . . sorry lovies !

siapa diriku di sisimu . . .
mysterious is what i call you; i'm curious about you . . . i'm scared that i'm not sure that you're safe. . .

2007-05-12T22:55:00.000+08:00
i am sad today !! :(( no mood for anything !

there is no more me in YOUR tomorrow dearie. . .

will there still be YOU in my tomorrow ?? :(

2007-05-11T09:48:00.000+08:00
haven been blogging for a looong time cos i'm lazy and my comp is spoiled. lam misses me cos he knows when is my last entry which means he has been visiting my blog quite OFTEN. . wakaka *right lam* haha. . okie. here's my life for the past 3 weeks. . .

life has been full of ups and downs this 3 weeks. . i got many troubles, sadness, happiness and pain . lets start with the HAPPy matter first! :p i love hanging out with S211, esp JEE, Yun, Russh and Ron, cos they are really jokers ! they nve fail to make my day as bright as the sun. . .i love hanging out with them; staying back and watch soccer where jee and i put MJ down (jokingly !!!) :p * MJ tak boleh~ * yes. . i watch soccer ! i'm beginning to love soccer cos its really fun and interesting ! hahaha. . . plus, i can see round star and kbox whenever i stay back for soccer. Yeah ! :p :p but, nah. . . i letting star and box go, cos . . . . . . *jee you knoe you knoe*

another thing is, i have been SHOP-ing for the past 2 saturdays. and i love SHOPPING !!! :p i bought many things i wan and i like. . . so far, 2 dresses, 1 tube, a shoes and necklace . . . i enjoy my times with Sy and i love Balcony. . . its lovely esp at night with the "swingswing". . . wakaka ! :p and i'm falling in love with alcohol. .. ahaha. :p right sy ? *blowjob, brain tumour, bombay sapphire, heninken * yeah ~~~ more retail threapy when i got more cash okie ? :))

anymore happy times ? i think that's it. . basically fun times come from my beloved friends. . . :) so my lovies, more fun times okie ? i really love MIA-ing and going crazy with you JEE . . . now moving on to pain and sadness. . .

abt the clinic job ? i freaking hate it !! how i wish i can burn the whole clinic down . . . *arghh!!* anyway, forget it. . . dont want to get pissed over it ! but i hate SUSIE a lot !! *bitch bitch bitch! bloody bitch* i'm on search for job again . . :( any recommendations ppl ?

family and financial is killing and suffocating me. . i cant seem to pass this hurdle . . . i'm actually cryng over family stuffs more than HIm now. . . i really need a break, if not how am i going to pass this hurdle ? i'm losing my grip and i'm tired. . . argh ! :((

about boyboy, i still miss him but i aint doing anything abt it. . cos i let him be. . . i will move on with life. . . :) your wish ! your decision ! your life ! let love find me not i find love. . <3>

taggies replies :
* Yun : i dont want to participate in the new game cos i dont wan to miss my chances of seeing them wakakak :p :p i nve pon sch ? i super tired on wed, so i need a breath, a breather. . :))
* JEE : you fell in love with my clip ? haha. . but u got urself a new one now. . nice !! search for more BUTTERFLY clips so we can wear them to school tmr !! and more paper chatting in class alrights ?? i'm addicted to papaer chatting. . wakaka :p
* Bush : haha... ya comp spoil. but i nve take 100 years to reply taggies. :p how are you russh ??
* Lam : here is the new entry lam. . . you will knoe more abt me , again . . hahah ! u must update too !!! :p :p

2007-04-29T18:07:00.000+08:00
i love labour day cos it falls on tuesday;; the day i hated most for my time-table. . (end at 505pm + 2 periods with HER) *eeeewwww* alright, i'm going to talk about a person and i shall named it "K". i cant stand K cos he's. . .
- always talking about his problems and force me to listen
- no limits in certain things he does
- take me for granted (as a fren)
- can be proud and irritating at times
wow. . i really cant stand him, and i feel like telling him straight at his face but arghh... nvm. *i shall bear with him* i too pissed to talk about him. :/

I was out with my girlfriend ytd for the whole day. we shop and shop and shop . . and wet Balcony at night. Balcony is lovely but it'll be lovelier if we get the bed or the VIP room seating. ** sy, we book the bed next time, if not we go Hard Rock Cafe alrights? * i love pubbing ! i love my alcohols ! i bought many things .. girly checked shoes from topshop, tube casual dress from ZARA and pencilcase from Borders. (photos will be uploaded soon ;) )
we talked abt out prob at Balcony and i nearly cry. why am i so weak and useless ? and why cant he msg me back ? what is wrong with him ? i duno what i should , seriously . . give me a break ! i want to get u out of my head. . why do all good things come to an end ?
competition with yun and jee in school is reali fun. *roundstar,milkshake,akua* i love it ! haha. . naughty guys, watch out ! wakaka . . i love s211 ! <3>

*i've been missing you a lot lately. . where are you ?

2007-04-22T21:36:00.000+08:00
it's blossoming !! i'm so happy to see that . . its so big and red pinky now. . so beautiful !!! but it will be gone sooon . . . :( nvm. . i keep dried flowers too !! wakaka :p

the weekends have come to an end . . i didnt do much this weekends cos i'm really lazy to use my brains ! i slack on saturday and today . . onli studied and do a lil hw jus now. nvm. . just give me a week off plzzz.. i'm tired of everything, esp having to think and miss MY GUY so much. . :(

i'm rather useless right ? cos i'm unable to get over him . . . wakaka ! that's why love cannot be explained. . . anyway, i simply love him, and i will wait for him . . till the feeling fades away. . :))

i'm having craving for CHOCOLATE cake and pizza now. . i dunno why !! pizza due to Mr Russh influence. . CHOCOLATE cake cos i'm a chocolate freak . . :((

** i'm sad cos i miss MY GUY so much . .
** i'm sad cos i wan my CHOCOLATE cake . .
** i'm sad cos i wan to have LONG BREAK from school and leave singapore . .
** i'm sad cos i wan PIZZA . .

2007-04-21T20:53:00.000+08:00

bday has passed, but i still love my prezzies from all my lovies :))
managed to upload all the pics today... so enjoy the pics !!

oh ya.. i wanna thanked sy and careen for the wonderful celebration on wednesday. the surprise in fish & co. is funny la... the staffs were so weird to do their cheers ! wakaka... :p thank you for the plan and of course, the wonderful and pretty necklace and hp stand. *love you my girls* <3
mich careen sy kawaii hp holder and cutie ballerina necklace *from sy and careen*
heart-shaped balloon *from Zhiyong*12 roses of 3 different colours *from JA*billabong wallet,correction tape,chocolates and chiili *from Yun JEE Russh Ron Liting Naqib*nike sidebag *from beloved tintin*kawaii mirror andkeychain *from weiting*famous amous cookies *from bran*
pink boxer and FOX shorts *from 06S208*birthday greeting card *from 07S211*loves *from kimmie* roses,watch and my name love the bag !! :)) <3

i had lotsa fun and i love everyone lots !! thank you for making my 19th birthday a unique and special one. especially to kevan, i knoe you have planned my bday celebration for quite sometime. really very very thank you for what you have done. i appreciate it alot !! *huggies*

*i still love my guy a lot...
**i am waiting for you ... <3

2007-04-20T21:49:00.000+08:00
happy birthday to myself !!! :p
i had lotsa fun with 07s211 and of course with 06s208 !!
kevan and zhiyong blew heart-shape balloons during morning assembly and keep shouting happy birthday to me... *paiseh* den when having pe, whenever they run pass the girls pe group, they oso shout "happy birthday michelle"... *OMG* :p :p
during recess, they bought cake and sang birthday song in 3 languages(malay,english,chinese) *ilovethem* followed by snow spray and poppers all over me. *wakaka* during chem prac and GP, they sang bday song too (they simply love singing bday song) *wakaka* :p :p :p

after school, i met up with S208 and they were so funny la... they gave me prez-BOXER !!!! and they video me cos they want to see my expression. after so, they gave me the real prez... haha !! so sweet !!! *loveslovesloves* thank ppl !! i miss u guys + girls ... :)

at night, i went to boyboy's house. . . didnt celebrate with him cos he was working. but his maid celebrated with me. she's sooo nice and i really love her !! she sayang me a lot... :p she brought me to eat at the market place, den gave a bag which i love lots. ;) thank you tintin !! then i went to meet ja and brandon. JA gave me a bouquet of flowers and identical(but differnet colour) watch !! haha... :p thank you JA! i realli love the roses... i duno what to say except THANK YOU!!! *shyshy* brandon and i drank a little before he walked me home... thanks for the prezzie my beloved brother !! i love the drink, and i want MOREEE ~~ !!!!! :))

okie... got lotsa prez from ppl...
** russh ron liting naqib JEE yunyun, thanks for the beautiful wallet. i love it cos it very nice !! really!! and thank you yun2 for the correction fluid, correction tape and chilli !! wakakak...
** kevan and all the guys in S211, thanks for the celebration cos i love whateva u guys have planned and did... its wonderful and i enjoy myself lots !!! more happy and crazy times coming up alrights ? :) *loves*
** ron, thanks for the waffle. delicious... *loves*
** wj steph eliz clar + the guys, thanks for the boxer and shorts... i love it !! but i not so fat la... 38 too big... wakaka !! :p
** kimmie, thks for the photo... its so lovely ! wont forget u ... :)) loves ! hugs!
** thank you jian an for the 12 roses and the watch... i reali love the roses !! *wakaka*
** bran for the choco cookies, with "happy birthday sis" from famous amos...
** tintin, i love you. i love the nike bag and thank you for everything. i know i have u and esther. i'm satisfied with you guys... *huggies*

all in all, THANK YOU PPL FOR MAKING MY 19th BIRTHDAY SUCH A UNIQUE SPECIAL AND WONDERFUL ONE... IN SHORT, I LOVE YOU GUYS !!! *muacksssss*

** i still love my guy though he nve reali contact me anymore and nve celebrate with me. i always love you dearie... <3

2007-04-14T22:19:00.000+08:00
i ask myself... ...

can i live without dearie ?

can i do without dearie ?

can i forget dearie ?

can i get dearie out of my mind ?

can i not call dearie "dearie" ?

can i let dearie go ?

can dearie = friend ?

can i not be sad and cry over dearie ?

can i be strong and not be dearie's girl anymore ?

i ask myself... ...

2007-04-14T16:21:00.000+08:00
been a week; 7days, 168hrs, 10 080mins, 604 800secs . . .
i am still missing and thinking of you deeply . . .
i really wonder when will it stop ? when when when ??
ppl think i am stronger and have moved on . . but i asked myself "mich, have you really moved on ? do you really have a positive mindset now ? "
the answer is : no. . . i am a stupid and silly fool, cos i lied to my frenz, most importantly, i'm deciving myself !!
though time is what he wants, but the answer from him is clear. . . as clear as water, it cant get any clearer. what can i say ?? am i doing too much ? or i have done nth that's why it end up this way ? i ask myself. . . i asked so many questions. . . but i cant get the answers. . . blank ! lost ! confuse !

when will he contact me again ? when will he tell me the answer ?? why am i still waiting ? i dont know. . but dearie, i miss you deeply !!! :( :( no one knows how i really feel. . . behind my smile and laughters are tears and pain . . . i'm hurt ! i feel pain . . . let me get over it fast !!!! :'(

academic:
i managed to get a B for my project work; a C for my chinese. . . forcus now is my H2 subjects- chemistry, physics maths + econs. . . gotta get good grades !!

* i am feeling tired . . .and i need your shoulder to lie on.
* i miss your kisses; kissing on my forehead. . it makes me feel so safe and secure. i know i can rely on you. . .
* i miss your presence, right beside me. . . i miss your voice, i miss you calling me !
* i miss you telling my that you love me. . . i miss you calling my darl !!
* i simply miss your every bits and movements . . . every little things you do !!
* i'm waiting for you... dangerously in love with you !!!

2007-04-08T17:03:00.000+08:00
i am reallu utterly super sad..
i say i'm not, and i appear very strong, but you guys know me...
the truth is, i'm very very sad and very weak now. i dun wan to show myself cos i dun wan to let u guys worry for me... why it happen again ??
all i ask for you is to contact and be with me... last a little longer but is it too much ? am i doing too much for this relationship ?? whateva it is, i'm still missing you... *i am missing and thinking and waiting and hoping for you... where are you ??? *

boy, i really enjoy this 2nd chance with you cos i can see the difference, but why cant we last longer ?? i'm tired.. tired of waiting and affecting my health... i cant afford to give up my weak health and body for you. if this goes on, i'll fall seriously ill. i'm moving on... and but at the same time waiting for you... i dunno how i should feel now, but i am still your girl... *always is* so all i can say now, i'm single again.... but nvm... my heart still holds you in place!! *iloveyou*

i want a long break from school, but i cant... i wanna spend time with you, but i cant.. in order to not let my mind go wild , i've decided to take up working.. i'll be schooling and working at the same time to forget u for the time being. still waiting for my employer to call, hopefully he brings me good news and i can start asap... boy, i will continue thinking and missing you however, pardon me for putting u off my mind during the day cos by doing this can i only act and stay happy in front of my frenz... but dun worry, you are nve forgotten by my, ur darl darl... <3 <3 <3

*i miss you
* i love you
* i'm waiting patiently till the day i go away...

2007-03-31T17:07:00.000+08:00
terrible week for me...!!

i had to psycho myself abt the relationship. what was i really thinking ? i duno... but i hope both parties are putting in effort cos its aint easy to maintain it... who can understand ??
everyone ask me not to think so much, but how can i not think when i know its going down the drain soon ?? i really wish to talk to someone abt it, but i realised i got no one whom i can talk to, except myself. perhaps its time for it to ... ... ... maybe i'll be happier ... ... ... ?? probably hanging on isnt the right choice ... ... .. ?? who can help me ?? haiz... *arghh*

please tell me what i should do ? love you... <3

other than that, i had lotsa fun with 07S211. they rocks, esp the guys cos they nve fail to brighten the class. and the election of class position is out.
CG rep : Kevan
Vice CG rep : ZhiYong
Treasurer : Me !!
Maths : Russh
Chem : YunYun
GP : Ron
thanks ppl..!! for making S211 a fun and interesting class !!

One thing i dun like abt the class is the irritating, annoying, idiotic CT, Miss Fauzana. i dun like her, and i'm not the only one !!! she is a lil' strict and no sense of humour at all... she laughs at the wrong time and be serious at the wrong time. alamak !!!! *stupid and idiot teacher* how am i going to survive with her ?? i feel like slapping her face whenever i see her... *slapslapslap*

I had zillion fun times with Jee Yun2 Cheryl Ron Russh.. *wakaka* ytd cheryl Jee Yun2 and i took bus 5 to far east, and i ate fried mars bars... *yummy !!* the curry chicken with cheese oso not bad !! i love the cheese !!

** Yunyun, i wan the Vans shoes.. go find a designer. faster faster !!! i wan it!! :( and and and... i'm moody cos i dun get to eat my choco cake for 3 days already. its sooooo long !!! i'm dying... :(
** JEE, we have same taste for clothes. we must go out one day together and shop like mad alrights ?? :) love hanging out with you ... haha... chat and gossip (abt... ... ... ) :p :p
** Cheryl, so happy that we go out together ytd. i had lotsa fun with you. join us more alrights ?? you're actually considered as one of the girls in our class alrdy !! yeah !!! welcome you anytime !!!

Girls... more outing okie ?? we paint the town red... haha !! :D :D

*what should i do ?? someone please guide me...
**all i ask of you is simple and nothing else...
***i'm dying here... save me if you wan to !

2007-03-23T18:51:00.000+08:00
i'm smiling...
i'm grinning...

i'm happy with S211 though only 4 girls.
JEE Yun2 Weiting and me will rock the class !!! :))

spend quite a lot of time with dearie this week, and i'm falling for him, so does he. haha :))
i'm really happy with the way we are now, and really hope we will remain like this long !!! *pray hard*

school starts already, and i'm beginning to mug.
i'm starting chem tutorial tmr and finishing it during the weekends.
other than that, i gotta practise my piano cos exams coming. i gotta pass with at least merit, ut hope i can get distinction though. however, always my nervousness kills me !! *arghhh* :(

i'm searching for job cos daddy vanished into thin air alrdy.
which means to say i'm supporting myself, so i need allowance !!
any job on hands , pls let me knoe alrights... *thanks*

Working hard for the relationship, friendship and studies !!
GOGOGO mich !!! :)

2007-03-17T14:41:00.000+08:00
hi ppl !!! i'm back to blogging, but cant be that often cos very bz. :p
i knoe everyone misses me... i do miss you guys lots lots too !!!

to 07S209 :
i miss u ppl lots... though we are really separating soon, but its ok. We shld be glad that we are together once and we had lotsa fun together aint it ?? for now... focus and study well in MJC cos its not ez... (its really not. trust me.. i've been thru it one year :p :p ) but its ok... friends are what we have, so we count on one another right ?? lastly, ppl, do keep in contact and remain as close as before. alrights ??

to JEE, Fadilah, Bush, Naqib, Yun2 :
you guys are someone i'm reali close with. so i believe this small separation wont do harm to our precious frenship rite ? *loves* as usual, i'm always here for you ppl; anytime, anywhere. remember that okie ? u knoe my number... (81188620). jus text or call me if u need someone. *love u ppl lots*

to 06S208:
haha... very lil ppl from 208 will read my blog, but whatever it is, i wanna say u guys are nve forgotten though i've left u guys. :) anything can contact me or come find me alrights ?? at the mean time, WORK HARD FOR YOUR BLOCK TEST !!! you guys are smart, so i dun have to worry for u ppl. dun disappoint me yea... gogogo!!! *loves*

now about me... nth much happen this few weeks... stayed home, and revise my work a lil, esp chemistry and idiot physics. :p i can make it through this year !!!! i got faith in myself !! yes yes yes !! :D other than that, settle some family problems, and coping with my mild depression and sadness at times ... can say i'm coping well ! so no worries loves... :D

my love life is great. i'm not holding on very tight, cos i dun wan to experience the same pain again, if anything happen (touch wood!!). but overall, we're moving on fine... :) *loves*

school is starting next week, so i'm going back to my nerd side at home. mug mug mug though its jus Year1. :)) i will balance my love, studies and family well. Afterall, studies and family are my first priority now(believe it or not).

lastly, to my dearest mommy and brothers(though she wont see this blog at all) :
i love you ppl a lot. Fabian, though i didnt say much, i hope u can knoe how disappointed and hurt i am towards you. i really hope you will learn after this experience. its really a second chance for you. friends are nth, but family is the one u can always rely on. pls wake up ur idea and stop making me worry and stress and tear for you. i'm tired my dearest brother...

korkor and jade, i knoe u worry abt me, esp him. but u guys nve put the trust wrongly. i love myself and the family more than anything else... dont worry and jus love me. sometimes i stay out cos i'm reali tired with the family prob at home during weekdays. *loves*

for mom, jus 3 words " I LOVE YOU "

tags reply:
* fadilah : sorry girl. i nve go mr ng farewell. very lazy. haha... u very lazy. wan all same class so u can visit at one shot. lazy girl... :) you will nve be forgotten.
* yun2 : i going orientation, but pon-ing quite a lot. haha... oh... everyone misses me. *shyshy* you will see me soon. haha
* bush : ya la... another 2 years with u... gosh. boring !! :)) joking... fun coming up !!!

2007-03-02T13:16:00.000+08:00
blogging at irritating bapok ronald house... *haha*
today is the last day of first 3 mths... * yeah!! *
i got 2 weeks break, and i can meet the boyfriend. *misses*
i had lotsa fun with Russh Naqib Ronald Liting Jihan.
love them lots... really hope that we will be together after PAE cos i love 07S209!!
* 07S209 rocks!! * :p :p

i miss you lots... hope to see you soon !! but i know we hav each other in hearts... *loves*

to liting: dun be sad abt ur da-gu death okie ? i'm here for you always...
russh : dun time-of-the-month. *smilesmile* dun care and jus move on sotong !!
naqib : dun be angry cos the irrtating guys always call u bapok... :) its jus a joke !!

taggies replies :
* fadilah : thank you girl... *loves* i am happy !!
* michelle : hi... you are ?? which michelle ? hahaha...
* stephanie : hellos stephie.... why ? miss me ar ?

* more fun times coming for 07S209 and us... :))

2007-02-22T19:19:00.000+08:00
I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU

BE BY MY SIDE ...
STAND BY ME ...
SAY YOU LOVE ME ...
I'M FALLING FOR YOU ...

<3>

2007-02-22T15:40:00.000+08:00
blogging time... :) many wonderful things happened this 1 week. :)
but i will jus focus on the most beautiful and lovely things..

firstly, went out with him on saturday morning at 1am... haha. went to watch Ghost Rider at CATHAY HOUSE and its wonderful. then he sent me home at 10am. its when we have a heart to heart talk. *loves* and everything is cleared. what i wan to knoe and ask, i've done so. *loves*

second beautiful thing happened on 19 feb night... i wont talk abt it here cos i think not ready yet. :) but i was reali happy and i wish things will go in my way. *ppl pray for me okie* in short... *aguchidekanmgao* (a language for me to knoe onli) hahah... :) i will work hard to it !! i will strive my best !! <3>

naqib is coming back tmr... *yeah* haha.... realy wan to thank russh and ron for accompanying me this one week cos liting nve come sch for 3 days last week. so quite lonely... but i dun feel lonely at all. i love u guys company !! *hugs*

okie... here's replying all the tags :
* fadilah - i sad you sad ? wan bully me ?? russh naqib ron and liting will kill u if u bully mich. hahaha... :p
* tin9z - yup.. i did take good care of myself on that 4 days. :)
* jun - yup. i'm Mich Li. u're jun hui ?? why u say ron nve give you ? give you wat ??? :p :p
* ron - wahahahha what ??!!! irritating... haha... :)

lastly.... i love you and only you !! tell me so... let me know... and i will love you more!! <3>

2007-02-15T15:03:00.000+08:00
ytd was V day !! <3
there are love, friends, happiness and sadness.
sadness : i expected something from you, but u didnt do anything.
forget it... i dun care anymore abt u. i feel sooooo happy after sorting out my thoughts. *YES!!* :)

happiness : got lotsa prez from my loves... :) <3
kimmie - lovely pink hanger with love note
steph - choco with starry note
weijin + girls - rose
clarice - ferrero with sweet note
Di - freshly, nicely baked cake from him
mel - handmade cookies from her
ron - ferrero choco
bran - red rose *thks for coming to my hse to give me*
siti - sweets :)
fadilah - chocolates !
and others...
THANK YOU for all the loves i received ! * BIG HUG for you guys !!! *

Naqib went australia on V day. haha.. and he nve bought anything for Jihan (Russh wants me to write this sentence). but anyway, how can Naqib leave us for one week + ??? so mean !!! :p haha... waiting for his prez from Aus next fri... *I WANT MY PREZZIE!!*

CNy is coming.. and i cant wait cos i wanna wear my new clothes... hahah!! :p i can smell the holidays and fun coming !! *yeahhhh* HOLIDAYS ! HOLIDAYS ! HOLIDAYS ! :))

lastly, wanna congrats all my classmates (07S209) for their WONDERFUL O levels results. Stay in MJC !! dun leave alrights ?? :)) *miss you guys lotsa... :p

P.S. i miss Naqib... where are you ?? enjoying ur irritating and annoying self in Aussie rite ?? *hate you*

2007-02-05T13:56:00.000+08:00
i'm blogging in school...
and i am really sad. :(
i am once hurt by him again...

why do that when u knoe i will be hurt... ??
i miss you lots

2007-01-27T15:44:00.000+08:00
long time since i last blogged. :D
nothing much happened the past week,
wake up at 6am everyday to go to MJC *dread ;
do tutorial and revise lecture notes ;
and of course had lotsa fun with 07S209 esp Liting.
haha... oh ya, not to forget, i've been attending nball practise and i love it
had fun with them... but the J1 are reali superb . *stress
i got a lil tanned from the last prac on wed cos we gotta do 40 ball passes (without drop) among ourselves. *wOOOooo!!! we kept dropping and we gotta re-do under the HOT sun. :(

other than that, my love life ? *sighh
he did contact me and i'm really happy ;
a lot to say about him or rather US.
in short, i am quite happy that both of us are in contact, cos he brighten my day. *smiling
but i reali hope Mr Right will appear soon, so i can move on (i guess he wont do anything abt it)

been staying home soooo long cos no one to acc me out to buy CNY clothes ;
sy final exams coming, so dun wan disturb her, unless she ask me out :p
maybe going out with aka next week, if not go out with jade and bro :)
what to buy and wear ?? *stress

P.S. my comp is spoil... sad ! :( bloody comp... *argh!!! i wan a laptop !!!

*i miss you so much...
** when will we meet again ??
*** i'm waiting...

2007-01-17T17:15:00.000+08:00

2007-01-14T00:08:00.000+08:00
i think i'm dying ,

let me die the next moment .
i'm tired .
a terrible time for me .
and you will never know .

2007-01-08T18:17:00.000+08:00

I WANT TO CRY I WANT TO CRY I WANT TO CRY
I WANT TO CRY I WANT TO CRY I WANT TO CRY

why am i so hung up on you?
i saw you online and i was elated,
hoping you talk to me.
but you didnt.
you gone off after a while...
why is this happening??
i think i am going to die soon if this persists
i am sad

I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD
I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD I AM SAD

i am not in the mood now;
let me disappear ...
let me disappear ...
let me disappear ...
just make me disappear ...
my one and only wish...
TO DISAPPEAR !!

2007-01-07T21:18:00.000+08:00

thank you ryan for introducing me the tarot card personality test...
and i'm the Empress. haha...
ryan is the Lovers. haha...
kind of true for both of us right ryantjr?? hehe... :)

here's my tarot card...

You are The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

2007-01-07T20:15:00.000+08:00

its 2 1/2 days already.
we didnt contact or sms...
i know i miss u lots but i gotta be strong and not sms you;
perhaps this is the time which i can let u go;
for long; for good; forever ...
i really wan u to stay happy and cheerful ,
jus like how u sound the last time we talked on phone.
and GOOD LUCKx100times in whateva you do;
i'm always behind you, encouraging you ...

i stared blankly at my cellphone
hoping to receive a text message from you;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
hoping to see my lil man light up and receive a call from you;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
hoping to see your name appear in my cellphone screen;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
it has been too long, too late since we last contacted;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
but it was always empty, exactly how my heart is now;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
i wondered where are you? ; are you okay?

i stared blankly at my cellphone
and realised i am no one, and nothing in your heart;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
and it hurt me so hard that i don't know what to do except for crying;
i stared blankly at my cellphone
and i guess it is time for me to emancipate .

i opened my heart to you
and you entered;
i received love from you
and we had precious moments;
but it is shortlived
and it ended fast;
it is time i guess.
emancipation of you <3

2007-01-06T22:36:00.000+08:00

what is going on in my life?
why are things going against me nowadays?
i'm feeling so terrible now.

i cant seem to get the study mood though school is starting on monday;
all the things i do are wrong and never manage to get it done right.
now,my body feel so fragile.

my head is hurting like its going to kill me the next moment;
my stomach is twirling, making me want to puke everything i have eaten earlier on;
i dislike this feeling;
its painful and terrible.
give me painkiller; or take me away forever...

i want you to be my side now;
but where are you?
i'm feeling pain and more pain.
what is wrong with my body nowadays?
i think its getting more serious as compared to the past.
somebody save me...
i'm in great torture and pain...

i dont feel good, seriously... ;;
where are you?

2007-01-05T19:15:00.000+08:00

okie... all the siao char boS (clar wj steph kim) just left my househaha... feel so happy cos i love them lots!!! <3 *sorry steph for not giving ur xmas prez still. but sooonnn alright? :)) long story... so wait for ur prez... hugs!

feeling so bored this few days, but luckily i log in Who Lives Near You again and there are many ppl to chat with . :p those ppl are despo but its alright. they wan play? i play with them... haha.. :))

when boredom kills * studying at wee hours

i'm bored...
i'm leaving you..
its time to say goodbye for long i guess...

2007-01-03T18:33:00.000+08:00

Lost without YOU

I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes
A little righteous and too proud
I just want to find a way to compromise
Cos I believe that we can work things out

I thought I had all the answers never giving in
But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong

All I know is I'm lost without you
I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

How my ever gonna get rid of these blues
Baby I'm so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You're the only thing that's on my mind

Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away
Can't stop the tears from running down my face
Oh

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

it seems like you are hurting me so often nowadays.
why do so when you know i mind a lot?
i really hope we can go back to the past,
but it seems like its impossible.
you hurt me once again, today...

2007-01-02T22:22:00.000+08:00

firstly, sorry sy for cancelling the trip today cos i'm reali tired (i slept at 5am) and the hot weather kills my mood. *if u angry, nvm lor.understandable... all the best for ur school tmr.

rest at home and den when TM with jade and korkor cos i wan cut hair. and yup.. i've trim my fringe and hair. i kind of miss my lOooong hair cos its nicer la. but the new hair not bad la... dun have to feel sad cos my hair grow real fast. in no time, it'll grow back LONG!!! yesh!! *loves... anyway, i cut at Jean Yip and the people were so kind. they even curl my hair(temporary onli;last few hours onli). not bad... but i think it look nicer in LOOooong hair. :p i want my Looonnngggg hair back!!! :DD *sOoonnn

den i did express pedicure with the vainpot jade. not bad la... it's dark mercury colour with glitters. nice ~

the day that everyone dreads and hates is approaching... *counting down- 9hrs... haha. school day! sians la... but nvm.. i guess i'm going to pon very very OFTEN!!!!!!!!!! hack about the damn BLUE school.

*i am not tired... how? dead~ and ... i'm scared of making new frenz. :((

2007-01-02T04:33:00.000+08:00

the clock is clicking,
and it shows 434am now.
why aint i in bed?
aha.. cant slp. :(
tmr is school day... *sadsad

i've decided to let the love set; stagnant it
i hope i can do it...
but he went to touch the stagnant water (he called me)
at a timing which i thought he wouldnt (2am+)
seriously i was shocked when he called cos i tot he wouldnt...
but i was like talking and screaming for help to sy in msn
cos we are so quiet ..
both of us were practically holding on to the phone, but silent...
*blUrrrrr so weird la... i was freaking out that i kept asking sy to tell me some topic to tok to him
haha... "sy sy.. u ask me tok abt school??!!!!!! girl ar... aboy and sch got no link... tsktsk! "

alright... i going out with sy lata to vivo...
more cam-whoring moments :p
at the mean time, wait for the pictures, and ppl, cya tmr!!!! *lOves

P.S. new song.. i love it lots !!! **Lost without YOU

2007-01-01T19:49:00.000+08:00

happy new year to my love, darlings and friends !

may this year be a wonderful and interesting one for you guys...
stay happy and carefree always!! *kisses

start of Year2006 with love between aboy and me,
and similarly, i had a great closure of it with seow yuan.
though times were short for aboy and me, i am really satisfied that it happened once. *loves

Year 2007 is a great start with drinking and crazy moments with seow yuan,
and i am looking forward to the closure of it *its ending soon.. :p
let's hop 2007 will a blessed one for me;
allowing me to find my love, my future and good results.

alright, ytd night, went out with sy and end up meeting my brother and jade to go pub.
we went to eat cafe cartel at PS first, den head to a pub/club, ROuge at somerset.
its really beautiful and the atmosphere is great, much better than that indian club,Gotham Penthouse. haha... :p :p
i had tequila with orange + some heninken... *nice drinks !!
the toilet is lovely too and there we go, CAM-WHORING!! aha...
after that, went to a KTV pub, club instinct, at bugis cos bro wants to go there meet his frenz.

the pub is horrible. it is for aunties and uncles. not youngster like us... :( :( i had martell with coke there... after the drink, separated with bro and jade cos sy and i dun like the place. *bad experience...
we wanted to go clarke quay,but thanks to the taxi company that there is no cabs at all. (and the bus is fully packed) *pissed

anyway, we roamed the street for about 1hr + and settle down at a hotel, and started cam-whoring again.
lastly, took bus to PS,hoping to go Giffra to drink but its closed cos its already 4am... :p
unable to squeeze up 2 bloody NR7 to head home, we took cab and fetch bro from marina square and off we go... HOME SWEET HOME!
but before that, sy and i had our first new year breakfast at McDonalds... yesh!!
*countdown with sy
*spend time with sy
*cam-whoring with sy
*breakfast with sy
sooooo happy !!!! :DD

den she came over my house at 5am+ and we chat, "play" and drink green aple vodka till 7am+... hahahaha!!! *lovely...
*** sy, paiseh ar.. make u run about. so sorry about it... but really had a fun time with you girl... more to come alright... hugs! <3>

** our unglam-ness in ROuge toilet ** haha :p

drinking tequila and heninken at ROgue *party babes

leaving lovely ROgue + swIsshotel :)

finally me... :))

perhaps its time to let go and not hold on anymore... should i ?

last day of 2006

2006-12-31T16:24:00.000+08:00

the last day of 2006 is here.
should i be happy or sad?
i don't know :(
let's recap my Year 2006 :

i didnt go first 3 months for JC and i really regret
cos if i have gone, i would know what JC life is like.
and i wouldn't have entered JC , and wasting another freaking bloody year
but what done has been done.
who can i blame? *haizz
not going first 3 months bring my joy and happiness in my entire life
becos i work at College East (ITE simei) and i met HIM
i met my LOVE- aboy.

i enjoy working with my colleagues- yi wei and doreen, especially when we go slack, kbox-ing,and buy nailart in the school itself. there is not a place for schooling, its for SHOPPING!! :)
of course not forgetting, i get to see him almost everyday though he skipped school sometimes.
i will nve forget the way he disturb me and how we met.
the word "stupid" brings us together!! :p
ever since we start contacting, we talk on phone every night
its really romantic and estatic.
den the day arrived when he asked me to be HIS GIRL *i'm smiling
yeah!!
go out; hang out; hold hands; hugs; kisses; watch him slp; be by his side at wee hours; not going home for 1 whole day; and some private stuffs
the feeling is great; cos i felt protected!! *lOvess

though the time is short, i am really satisfied cos we were once together. i dont ask much.
and i still LOVE him :p *shy
and... entered the BLUE school (MJC), and start mugging
get to know wonderful frenz like weijin, steph, clarice, eliz, and all 06S208. *love them
i will nve forget that 06S208 gone thru mani mani hardships together
and my frenz and i been through so many turmults ;
we quarrel; argue; angry; gossip; piss; scold teacher; argue with teacher; score the lowest; fail everything; slack; pon school+lectures+tutorials; mug together; enourage one another; be pirates; etc...
but most important is that, WE ARE STILL BONDED AS A CLASS!! *i love 06S208

to 06S208: ppl, though mel ron ryan and myself are left behind, pls dont forget us!! for myself, i will always rmb u guys and hope you guys will stil include me in for any events or outings. its been an enjoyable time with u ppl, and i believe you guys do have the potential to do well cos this promos show everything. so, pls do work hard for ur A levels and enjoy later! :D i love you guys !!!! *i'm serious hor...

lata part of 2006, got mid-year which i flung everything (FFFFFFFFFF) and i worked so hard , but efforts did not paid off during promos (SSSSUU). yes better results, but cos i fail chem and physics, they dun allow me to be promoted. *haiz *i'm sad

nvm... its the fact already. and i choose to retain after so mani litres of tears i shed. hope its the right choice !!
den work at MOE, and realised marking is NO FUN!!!! haha... bear for a month and i'm free. earn some money for myself to spend... :DDD that's all for my life i guess!!

achievements for 2006:
1. i finally own a pair of 140bucks Levis jeans
2. at last, i got a better eyelashes curler (Shu Umera)
3. i kind of got a whole full set of make-up
** 4. i fall in love with someone i love a lot!! *honey kisses for aboy
5. i maintain my weight!! :)
6. i made new and wonderful frenz *loves
7. i've been to clubbing (though its a terrible virgin club experience)
8. i'm slightly more daring (in dressing)
9. closer with my bitch- seow yuan *love love love
10. i'm not racist or vulgar still

failures in 2006:
X waste a year in BLUE school again
** X unable to let go of my dearest aboy
X didnt slim down
X didnt get to tanned *arghHhh
X didnt get to gain trust from my besties (wj and steph)
X so many things i want to get it done such as solve all family prob, but i fail. in fact, adding more probs *sad :(
X cant help my dearest bro, fabian, with his case
X i cried a lot this year *and i reali mean it - CRY A LOT, for ABOY, aboy aboy; studies; friends; parents; money; brother; fear; loneliness etc...
X disappoint quite number of ppl

a better year 2007 for me!!!!!!!!!!! more happy times with sy, 06S208 and ABOY !!!!!!!!!
i love you guys !!!! <3>

All My Life

2006-12-30T22:53:00.000+08:00

I will never find another lover sweeter than you, sweeter than you
And I will never find another lover more precious than you, more
precious than you

Girl you are close to me you're like my mother,
Close to me you're like my father,
Close to me you're like my sister,
Close to me you're like my brother
You are the only one my everything and for you this song I sing

And all my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I hope that you feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do love me too
I said you're all that I'm thinking of.....baby

Said, I promise to never fall in love with a stranger,
You're all I'm thinking of, I praise the Lord above,
For sending me your love, I cherish every hug,
I really love you

And all my life, baby, baby, I've prayed for someone like you,
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you, baby
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I hope that you feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do, love me

You're all that I ever known, when you smile, on my face, all I
see is
a glow.
You turned my life around, you picked me up when I was down,
You're all that I ever known, when you smile on your face all I
see is
a glow,
You picked me up when I was down
You're all that I ever known, when you smile on your face all I
see is
a glow,
You picked me up when I was down and I hope that you feel the
same way
too,

Yes I pray that you do love me too
All my life, I've prayed for someone like you,
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

All my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

i didnt sleep a wink the whole morning till 8am. *wOooo ~
dont why i cant slp,
maybe cos i'm missing you,
or maybe there's a lot of tv prog on MTV like GirlFight, and E Buzz. :D
den went very earli breakfast with fatty korkor at Macdonalds , at 5.30am *hahah
i am soo happy that you called me last night
and we actually sms each other the whole morning = 6hrs plus (on and off) *elated

NYE is tmr! going out with lovie seow yuan again.
where shal we go?
not sure... either pubbing ,
or KTV-ing ,
or expo for the mambo countdown party.
we'll see how tmr... :)
what should i wear???? *hMmm~
tube? off-shoulder? *vExxx

what happened to you?
why do that to me? whywhywhy??
i'm confused but i know i'm hurt by ur actions...:(
i want to know what you are thinking ;
please tell me

2006-12-29T01:43:00.000+08:00

first, i did some blog tests
and here's the results (its sooo true!)

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner.Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare.You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie.Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you.For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

You're a Romantic Kisser

For you, kissing is all about feeling the romanceYou love to kiss under the stars or by the seaThe perfect kiss involves the perfect moodIt's pretty common for kisses to sweep you off your feet.

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.You tend to take more than give in relationships.You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.

second, i went out with sy to watch charlotte's web. Wilbur is really cute and Charlotte is very helpful. love the movie lots!! :D you guys should catch it!! :))

and here i am, at home. haha... :))

he didnt call me today
where are you?
what are u doing?
why nve call me???
i sms , den u call ;
i dun sms , u dun call ?
i miss you loads... :(((((

2006-12-28T13:58:00.000+08:00

its thursday
school is drawing near
give me a break man
irritating bloody freaking MJC !!

been in contact with him since xmas eve
i'm really happy
really really happy
i feel i'm the happiest girl in the whole world
but i scared my happiness is short

we chat for all most every night and we actually talked a lot
including our relationship
everything!!
its a good thing i think...
i miss him even more... <3

i am satisfied with just like that
i dont ask much
just be by my side always
and not leave me alone :)
* i'm smiling

2006-12-27T00:28:00.000+08:00

the rain kills my mood
cant leave the house or even suntan
gosh~! i love the rain, but it shouldn't rain all day

school is re-opening,
but i haven enjoy yet !!
pls, take me out from schooling...
i dun wan to school !!
let me find someone who loves me like mad and i love him too
and he's rich
and he's around my age
and he's willing to marry me NOW
and i dun have to study!! can be tai tai... hahah
it's jus me dreaming !!!!!!!!! :p :p

hope he's enjoying and taking good care of himself now :))
i'm rotting and dying here... :((
i miss him...
NYE is approaching...
kiss goodbye to year 2006 *mUacksSsssss~
open ur arms and welcome 2007 *hUgsssSss
hope it'll be a better year for michelle
YES IT WILL BE,
filled with LOVE LOVE and MORE LOVE

i feel lost
i feel lonely
where are you?
i think something is missing in my life
what could it be???

2006-12-25T19:29:00.000+08:00

loves for all my loved ones *hearts*

i love this year xmas though i didnt go mel's or bran's hse or church.
all my loved ones are by my side today ( sy and aboy)
so happy~~ :p
went to clarke quay with lovie seow yuan and zul,
had dinner at HOOTERS,
the girls(waitress) were... OMG! haha
why did zul go MIA so often today?
hmmm~ wondering!! :D
nvm.. sy and i were happy and as crazy with or without him

den my virgin cluhouse at Gotham Penthouse *horrible*

all i can say is... my virgin clubbing is horrible, but i believe next time will be better !!
Gotham Penthouse are like... a lot of eurasian-indians *dUhh!*
and quite a number of working ppl ,
no young guys to hook up with *sad*

vodka with cranberry
i like the drink but the vodka aint strong enough. :(
the night was very young when we entered at about 10pm plus
and the night went wild after the countdown to the arrival of christmas!! :))

party all night,
dance to the groove sexy mama
dance like nobody business
dance like you're a sexy bitchy girl
rock on~!!!

den went mac cafe for iced chocolate for cooling down *haha*
after that, sy went to my house at 5am plus *wOooo*
and we ate log cake together!!!
romantic ~ chocolate log cake rocks!!
she left my house at 6am, taking the first bus :p
while i go and meet aboy *sweet~*
to pass him his prezzie and we slack and eat breakfast together
though nth much happen btwn us, the existence is most impt (like i always say)
i love him !! <3>
(but sadly, i think its the last time i will see him ) :'(
and he send me to bus stop, separated at abt 845am :p
hugs and kisses solely for him *muacksSss*

alrighty.. that's all for my xmas celebrations. :D love all my lovies, darlings and baby. :))

2006-12-23T15:06:00.000+08:00
many irritating matters happen :(

THURSDAY:
zul asked sy and i to join christian and marcys to a place called SETTLERS at katong to chill. before that we went to watch movie ...
initially we are supposed to meet at 4pm but zul change the timing to 6. *dUhhhh!!*
ok nvm... den he told us to meet at 5pm,to have dinner b4 movie. but guess what?
we called him at 515pm and he is still at pasir ris mrt waiting for marcus, while christian is still at tanah merah. -.-
in the end, we GIRLS gotta buy tix for them first, making me withdraw my money :((
then we girls go in first, cos chris is late. the guys came in late, at abt 615pm. -.- late!
forget it.. den we went katong after that. we actually left tamp at 845pm when the place will be closing at 11pm. we took bus 10 there, and the place was PACKED!!! but in the first place, the place is not big la... -.-
the climax: the guys got the shame to leave 2 girls alone at katong while they go and play LAN. what a shit~~!!!!! i'm super pissed la... sy and i dont wan go back since we are there, so we intend to walk. den the guys actually dun bother to acc us. *very pissed* to test out zul's gentleman-ness, sy sms him saying "hey... we lost our way already. thks to you. " and guess what mr zul replied after sooooo long , "sorry? anything call me... " *blood boiling* forget it man!!!
call you guys man...
first, change the timing but late in the end
second, late but dun bother to call or sms to let us knoe.
third, ask us go what stupid place called settlers at katong
fourth, FOR THE CHEEK to leave us alone
so what u like me? i think forget it la... even if i'm over my dearest dear dear aboy, i wont like you. you're not my type! fail the category of "gentleman" !!! my dearest aboy wont leave girls alone. NEVER EVER! shame on you~~

hate you hate you hate you hate you hate you !!

FRIDAY:
went lawyer place with mommy and fabian. i wore a skirt that i LOVE but i end up rushing home to change once i took the lift down. why? cos of the irritating wind+ rain. my skirt practically flew up. so annoying~ haha... :(
my beloved cousin , jiayu, actually call fabian "darling" . hahaha... cute~ miss her lots!! <3>
heartpain! " ahma, must get well soon soon. "

after that, mommy acc me go Novena to buy aboy bran and weijin xmas prez. :p all the way there... so ma fan but cos of my frenz, its worth it! :p in the end, mom bought prez for her "godson" jason and beloved brother, fabian. :D loves!! <3

today:
going to buy Miss Kan Seow Yuan xmas prez. she'll love it!! sy u better love it!! but if you dun like, i oso dun care. hahahahahha :p :p get my prezzie ready. cant wait to see you tmr night. wOooo~ our party is appraoching!! cya tmr... hugs!!

wish list:
red tube,
mini skirt,
high heel shoes,
money to learn driving

wishes:
1. grandma to recover fast fast. get back to her healthy health
2. mommy to stay happy and not vex over money so often
3. elder brother to fulfil his "lose weight" wish, and work hard towards a brighter future for himself and his wife, jade :p
4. jade to stay happy and not vex job-hopping prob. settle down :)
5. my dad to stay healthy and take good care of himself
6. my younger bro to remain guaiguai... dun have any misfortunes on him cos its enough. want him to stay happy and cheerful forever. and stop all the gf-hopping :p
7. aboy to remain cheerful and carefree forever. if found HER, hope he is happy and contented. give him the strength to do anything he wan cos i knoe he do feel sad and lonely at times but din express out. i'll encourage and support you always. *hugs*
8. aka to not fret over her pimples cos she's pretty jus bing herself. and give her the ultimate strength and courage to make new frenz or widen her social circle + protect and bless her family, fae, aniq and newborn baby arman with best health and beauty. :)
9. sy to stay crazy and siaosiao always cos she'll nve knoe who actually falling in love with her smile. haha... cliche~ jus stay happy and healthy forever. out friendship to last till we die. and find her Mr Right soon
10. steph and wj to stay positive always. give wj the strength to pursue what she really wants to(eg, r/s). wj, dun be afraid to fail cos through them, you learn and u will be stronger. trust me. i'm experienced. steph so always remain so bubbly and optimistic. ur love life will be paid off with your on-waiting heart. i knoe you will be the happiest girl in the world even w/o love. take your time to find. *love you girls*
11. all my other girlfriends to work hard in school and stay crazy and geeky forever. haha... :p :p bmay beauty stay with you girls
12. 06S208, work hard and be one of the best class . do well for A levels and remain lunatic always. :) i love you guys. hugs!!

2006-12-21T12:58:00.000+08:00
school starting soon
but i haven enjoy yet :(
give me 48hrs a day
or even more...

i need money
i want money!!
i want to buy mani things
i have to buy mani things
MONEY MONEY MONEY

where is my money!!!!!!!!!!!
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

2006-12-18T20:02:00.000+08:00

feel so great without work :p
when sushi-ing with MOE colleagues on sunday(ytd)
we met up at 1030, but i was late again :p
the place is at novena
and each plate cost 10cents onli !!!
cheap cheap~~ typical singaporeans *hahaha*
i do enjoy myself but not so much cos i dun reali like sushi cos they are not my type of food *tsk* some pics of the sushi and dessert *yummy~~*

sushi for 10 cents *wOooo~
healthy green tea + jap rice in it
mango classic *yUmmy~

den we went shopping at VELOcity and novena square. and i bought a tee (very nice!), a perfume which smell wonderful and mesmerising and deoderant(sweet sweet!) . all cheap cheap~ good gain!! hao shou huo :D

deoderant
perfume
tee

den left for my piano lesson (i was late for 25mins) hahah... but nvm. after that, i went out with sy to orchard. :) didnt do anything there except for eating and walk ard. i reali wan shop but my feets are hurting a lot. i'm serious!! i can bearly walk. how i wish i can go home straight, but cant. :( we left orchard abt 11pm. what's worse is that... ... THERE IS NO SEATS IN BUS 518 !!!!!! i am so bloddy freaking idiotically pissed!

this shoes kills my feet! :(

why cant SBStransit have more seats ? cant they add in "THESE SEATS ARE FOR YOUNG LADIES ONLY !!!!!! " i seriously think SBS should ask MEN to give up their seats to WOMEN. where's their gentleman-ness ??!!! argh~~ and my feet hurts!!! pissed!! imagine i gotta stand all the way to tampines???? i swear!!! swear swear swear that i will definitely learn driving !!! my target : start learning at the age of 20, latest 21. that's for sure!!! i hate public transport!!!! moreover, not onli the INSUFFICIENT seats issue, girls do meet chiko pek (brushing their disgusting rotting hands against our arms/ tried to touch u and make it look as if its accidentally/ try to look at ur boobs if you wear low-cut top)!! they are like trying to peek into ur blouse and look at ur boobs! gosh~ c'on guys!! stop being so despo... keep staring at it wont make our blouse go transparent!!! and and and... girls wearing low-cut top is NOT EQUAL to letting u guys touch or even attempt to ask for more. i dun blame u guys for looking at our cleavage, but there's a limit !! no staring at it till u drool or have the i-want-to-molest-her thinking ! cant stand guys... oh mine!!

i love her !! <3

today went gym-ing with steph wj and linyun (steph fren). so tiring... :( but fun cos from 2-4pm its solely for women onli. *scam off guys ! giveupseatsandspaceforwomen !! :p :p den had subway for lunch and dinner. yesh~ i feel so healthy and healthy and healthy!! :D love you gals!!! *wj, you treat sarah better!! * hurthurthurthurthurt :( :(

christmas is coming!! maybe going clubbing~ wOoooo :P but but but... holz ending :(((((

2006-12-15T21:13:00.000+08:00
jus being ourselves!! <3

today last day of work at MOE
finally cos i cant stand Gary
he is just so weird
i had gain wonderful experience and i love the ppls there
going to miss them... :)
here's the pics of some of them ... ... ...

yinwei / ah du / wj's competitor
jia min / calories girl :p
choonyan / steph's cousin

my partner!! / rui long / ah long
caryn

steph me yinwei jiamin

didnt go sy's sista bday partly cos...
1. i reali reali tired that i fell aslp in the bus on the way home
2. i duno anyone there except sy
3. i am sad sad
4. what if i go there few mins den wan go off, so paiseh
5. i wan watch my tv :p
sorry sy !! hope you are not angry

duno why... i am not happy!! (not becos' of leaving MOE ppls)
i am very very sad...
very very sad... :'(

2006-12-13T20:03:00.000+08:00

happy birthday to my beloved aboy
its your 18th birthday ytd
and i managed to spend with you, by just being by ur side
i am so so so so happy to see you again
words cannot describe how i feel
cos i really miss you a lot :)
feel so glad being by ur side
feel so secure and protected :p
really hope you will ask me back
but i just think you wont
cos... my sixth sense tells me

haix!! :(
i will move on only if there's a guy who treats me as good
and able to make me feel secure and protected
but when will him appear?? or you??
haix~
hope you wont leave me
and be by my side ALWAYS ~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY aboy~
i'm HAPPY~~~~~~~~~~~ (to see you again)

his bday cake from his brother tsktsk~

him and his members ~

2006-12-10T12:46:00.000+08:00

weekends are here
weekends are gone :(
work starts tmr again
arghhh~

went metro sale with bro and jade ytd
so fun!!!!! :D
although we spend all the time buying working clothes for bro
but i still enjoy it cos' i love choosing clothes for guys
why?
cos they look nice in all type of clothes,
esp the ones i choose :p
my DEAR must dress smart-casual but handsome
must got his own STYLE !!

not forgetting
i gain things from the trip too
i bought a new concealer , loose powder and NEW lipgloss
i love what i bought! but sad, cos didnt buy bra. :(

this weekend is fruitful,
but i have to start studying soon
i think i will start with chemistry today first. :p
GO Michelle!! you can do it !!!

* damn the flying cockroach who made me cry and scream * :'(

2006-12-07T18:54:00.000+08:00

feeling blues
so unhappy with everything
i don't know what i should do
no one to love me
no one to understand me
i just need you by my side
can you?

the season of giving is approaching
getting closer each day
but where are you?
am i suppose to spend alone again?
please take me with you

take me away from this sorrowful world
kill me
murder me
let me sleep and die
any ways
just remove my existence from this world

* jade, thanks for the early early x'mas prez. <3>

2006-12-05T20:18:00.000+08:00

unlucky day for me today

1. a bloody freaking shitty slut/bitch "scolded" me for not pressing the lift open for her;
feel like telling her: hey bitch! dun think i scared of u cos u are older den me. age dun matter to me ok. how the hell do i knoe the lift is serving 2 freaking idiotic levels? and how the damn hell do i knoe u are coming in? reali feel like slapping u. IDIOT! scram away from my sight. cos ur sight IRKSSsss me to hell. ur disgusting lame idiotic face pissed me off. *bloody hell*

2. didnt get to hand in my time sheet. if i were to send ytd, the bloody ann would have received today rite? what's the difference? so pissed la. this means i wont have money any time soon la. and yes ppl, i miss 2 chances ofnot handing in my time sheet. but do u have to rub salt on my wound? huh???? the chance has passed so jus let it passed. *arghhh*

3. stop all the nonsense. dun bother me. there's a limit for everything. YOU stop it!!! there's a limit for teasing, joking others. i mean, enough la. i so tired of everything. accepting all the bad teases and jokes. what can i do?? i dun care cos i got too mani things on hands to care already. i cant take in anymore if not i bound to commit suicide. jus let me off people!

how i wish i can slp and nve wake up forever. the family, financial, court case, work, studies, frenz, retaining, dad , mom problems are killing and suffocating me. i cant breathe but u knoe?? i doubt so. forget it!!!! i'm tired.... jus let me off

let me off... set me free... release me...

2006-12-02T23:30:00.000+08:00

yeah~ its the weekends again. so happy. but today i gotta wake up earli to go agency and pass time. sian~ after that went for lunch, and the pathetic youtiao is so "worth it". thanks ar ... 3 bucks for that tiny winy one. *arghh* then went to shop for sch shoes and wj steph me bought the same pair of nike shoes. *yeaH* :p i manage to bargain for them and myself from 82.95$ to 70$. cool yea? heex... "wj and steph, say thank you !!" the indian uncle who served us is so good... see gals! dun be racist. :p

this is the shoes! brown with orangey-pink. :p *loves*

den went off to meet atiqa. went orchard and shop centrepoint. the GAP there is so PATHETIC. gosh~ can close down la. heex. den walk all around orchard. went home at about 8pm and i onli buy a hp pouch from m)phonsis + normal sleeveless top from topshop. i've been wanting that top and finally i got it. :D :D had lotsa fun with my beloved atiqa!! *hugs for you* muacks :p

tmr maybe going sun-tanning if it nve rain. yeah~ :P sun, here i come!!!!

2006-11-29T18:31:00.000+08:00

today's the third day of the 2nd week of work. i had half day leave today in the morning cos i gotta attend some serious serious family prob in the morning . and in the end, its a total waste of my time cos it onli lasted for 5mins. *aarghh* nvm... after that, mom fabian bro jade and i went vivo to eat lunch at 10.15am... haha. that's earli but nvm. and i bought a necklace from topshop. nice nice~ i wanted to buy a top from zara but there's no size. all too big... :( the tops are reali beautiful and sexy *haix*

then reach work at 1pm. and i went to the orange place to find them...guess what i saw? haha... JS was drawing "naked" weijin and ryan on the board, with the necessary hairs at cetain areas. Yucks~ JS is CHILDISH!! haa~ oh ya. i bought choco from candy empire them. "choco taste nice rite? " heex. reali love them a lot. *hugs and kisses* den start "marking" till 5pm.

but in between keep disturbing JS and steph. ryan so serious cos of his caryn... gosh~ we took MRT home and something shocking happened. when the train reaches tampines, i say bye to steph and JS, and jus when i was about to walk out of the entrance, JS used his newspaper and spank my butt. " JS, YOU ARE SOooOOooo DEAD tmr !!!! " i'm going to kill you. so paiseh la... everyone was looking at both of us.. i was shocked even though i alighted ok... haahaahaa~stupid Tham Junsheng !!!!

that's the end ... love thems lots ~ <3>

next wednesday is the day.. how?? praying hard~~~

2006-11-27T22:22:00.000+08:00

i think i am beginning to hate myself
my looks
my dressing
my fashion sense
my figure
my fats
my face
my texture
EVERYTHING!!!!

i hate myself
i wanna leave this world
take me to elsewhere
take to a place where looks and beauty are nothing

i hate myself !!!!
Michelle, you're an ugly duckling
dream on being a beautiful sexy swan

2006-11-25T15:25:00.000+08:00
its been a long time since i blog. its been a long week for me. so tiring~ so boring~

monday i started working at MOE, marking some stuffs. but the first 2 days were my training days where i'm supposed to knoe what code to give if the student do wrongly, correctly or leave blank. not too bad cos u are actually paid 6.50 bucks jus sitting there and listen to the person talk. haa.. :) after work, went NTUC to buy some chalet stuffs, in my high heels and formal wear. so irritating~ i dun like to wear formal la. :(
tuesday is the 2nd day of work. as usual, listen to the man talk about maths paper. its the chalet day.. after work went to collect keys from costa sands cos i'm the onli one who can collect (18 yrs old) . den went home, and change. actually suppose to change den leave for chalet. but i'm reali reali reali so tired that i dun wan go. I think steph angry cos wj and i dun wan go stay, which means she'll be the onli gal staying there tonight. anyway, i went down to eat dinner with bro and jade at 9pm+, when a call comes which spoil my mood. i tot of going to chalet at 11+ but i cant cos i gotta wait for mommy and go out lata. so too bad. fated! i was scared...

and once again, i cried on tuesday night ever since getting my promo results... *teary*

wednesday, got something reali impt in the morning. tot of taking urgent leave but i cant cos its the first day where we officially mark the papers. with worries and pain in my heart, i dragged myself to work. when boarded the train, i pass JS my nike bag, and stand at the entrance myself. secretly, i cried (tears welled up in my eyes). i tried so hard to fight back the tears cos i received a sms from fabian. i'm worried and scared for him!! i nearly wanna alight at paya lebar and go home. i'm afraid that i wont see him again. no one can understand how i feel... *fear*

after work went chalet, but din stay again cos i dun feel like. went home.. and luckily he's alright. we are able to use something in exchange to get him out for the time being. *fear mounting in me* chalet is fun.. love theM!! going to miss 06S208 next year cos wont be with them already. :(

kimmie and mich <3>

06S208 *loves*

thursday and friday nth much... jus keep marking the papers and having some self-proclaimed breaks in between cos we are reali so sleepy. I'm so tired that i nearly fell aslp while marking the papers. haa... but for the sake of money, what to do.

oh ya.. on friday, after work, ryan js steph wj and i went to adidas sale at expo. thks to the irritating gal, jia min for her news. haha... i spend a total of 65 bucks there. nice tops and skirt! :D love there!!!! den went to have dinner with my family + edward. i feel so happy cos we nve have dinner as a family for so long, esp with fabian ard. hope that will not be the last time.

weekends...!!!!!! slp late late... replenish my energy! :)

i'm worried for you. do you knoe??
i knoe u do all u can ( pray everyday, bathe flower water) but i reali hope ur sincerity will give you another chance.
i duno what else i can do but jus hoping for the best.
i will be there for you on wednesday, and pls give me the strength not to cry again.
i wish u all the best.
perhaps its my fault that lead u to this route...

2006-11-15T12:54:00.000+08:00

I'm so gonna catch Girls Out Loud. its interestin~
girls, check it out!!!

2006-11-15T11:43:00.000+08:00

wish list :
1. eyelashers curler
2. bag!!
3. necklace
4. hot red, gold and black nail polish
5. hot red colour belt
6. shorts
7. skirt
8. hot red dress!!!!!
9. high heels girly shoes
10. LOSE WEIGHT!!!!
11. Mr Right to appear!!

accomplished :
* maybelline unstoppable mascara
* eyelashes comb :)

*** Convenant is lovely ***
he is soooo handsome~~ she is so pretty~

Laura Ramsey

Steven Strait

i want the top on Laura !!

2006-11-13T23:48:00.000+08:00

finally get to see Im after sooo long. she's still the same, and i miss her. went her house ytd for hari raya visiting. its was fun though no one acc be except Mr Zulfadhli. *grins* i realised Azri is considered as part of im's family... hmmm???? *sly smile* heex

after so, thought of going home but in the end, went TM with Mr Zul. wana catch movie (step up or covenant) but all shows starts at about 2130 which is so late and i'm terribly exhausted. so nah... nve watch. sorry zul~ instead, we went to "cure" my craving which have been with me for 3 days. we went to weat ice-cream. *hooray* i had a very cute one ; a round brownie with cookie-and-cream ice on top of it, with a tiny winie jar of chcoc sauce and strawberry. wOOooo~ sound nice rite? its reali nice!!!! its delicious, but sinful... heex. but who cares? i need my chocolate!!!!!

" Zul, pls stop being a social ** . you get what i mean... c'mon!! stop it k? "

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

today i had netball carnival at RGS. subconciously i walk out of my bed at 0515 in the morning,board one of the earliest bus, took the train and reach ORCHARD MRT at 7am. *laughing* this is the first time i see orchard so empty and quiet. its UNBELIEVEABLE~ hah! game was fun, chicken rice was WONDERFUL girls... more outing coming up yea... :)
<3

okie... off to bed... off to lala land.
<3

2006-11-12T12:41:00.001+08:00

i came back this morning onli... *yippee* haha... went out with sy again. we slack and drink and watch material girls... its very nice~ shld watch it!!! :p

okie...i reach home about 3am.. "sy, let come home at 4am next week!" *heeeeeeee* its sunday... shld i go im's hse lata?? haix... i duno. shld i go netball match tmr?? haix... i oso dunno... hate to make decision... can someone be there by my side all the time to make decision for me???

where is my Mr Right???
....waiting....

once again our crazy pics... i <3

+... love you sy...+
more coming up... hugs and kisses *muacks*

tired

2006-11-11T01:47:00.000+08:00

what a day! first day at Dunman High School and i lost my way there. *arghh* i took close to 2hrs to reach there. what a long distance yea.. *arghh* so sleepy yet i gotta be alert not to miss the stop. *arghh* reach there at 945 instead of 9am. *grins* do some stupid job; packing the stationary, tying the student record fies. what a toopid job! so painful la... my hands hurts!!! make my hands rough onli... should i still go on monday?? haix... *arghh*

after that, went 85 to eat with them ; steph wj gib ja js tw. its delicious but spicy *hothothot* den went steph hse for a while... after that left with wj first.

reach home, den start using computer, den... aboy came online. we chat with each other... the exictment and anxiety are there again. it welled up in me again ~ *haix* why am i such a failure la... aiyoyo!! i dunno.. miss him so much!! i feel like having a boyfriend... but where is he?? :(

Boy A dun like Girl B
Girl B cant be with Boy B
Boy A wont be with Girl B
***** hurt *****

tired... off to bed soon!! i need to moisturize my hands...
** lots of moisturizer **

P.S. no ja pls!! steph stop all ur nonsense yea... haha... :p "BA NI AR!!"

test results

2006-11-09T11:12:00.000+08:00

What You Really Think Of Your Friends
Melanie is your soulmate.
You truly love Atiqa.
You consider Roo your true friend.
You know that Seow Yuan is always thinking of you.
You'll remember Clarice for the rest of your life.
You secretly think Myself is creative, charming, and a bit too dramatic at times.
You secretly think that Weijin is colorful, impulsive, and a total risk taker.
You secretly think that Stephanie is loyal and trustworthy to you. And that Stephanie changes lovers faster than underwear.
You secretly think Kimberley is shy and nonconfrontational. And that Kimberley has a hidden internet romance.
What Do You Think of Your Friends?
Guys Like That You're Charming

You're the girl most guys can't get out of their heads
Even if they met you on a bad hair day :-)
You just seem to "click" with everyone you meet
So even if a guy forgets about you for a second... his friends haven't!
What Do Guys Like About You?
You Are Bad Girl Sexy

Girl, you are nothing but trouble. And that's hot.
You've got the classic bad girl sexiness mojo going on.
And your badass attitude makes men fear you - and crave you.
Don't give into people who say to tone it down. You're perfect as is.
What Kind of Sexy Are You?

2006-11-08T21:50:00.000+08:00

today stephie wj and tw nve come. haha... nvm. i'm tired too.. its okie! :) i woke up at about 12pm, use comp, watch tv and went back to slp again at 3.30pm haha... till 6.45pm. :p

after bathing, i went down to have dinner with junsheng... we had chicken chop, carrot cake and spaghetti. haha... his treat~ yeah! i treat him sugar cane back la.... *grins* anyway, i saw alvin ... but i think he din see me. good good... oso dun wan see him .haha...

yea.. that' it! my day1 for holz.. hope service connections can get back to me fast fast cos i've sent them my resume. yea!!!! job job job... :)

those advance ppl in 06S208, jia you wor... cannot fail block test k? must study!!!! GO GO jia you jia you jia you ~

*hugs and kisses for you guys* <3

2006-11-08T13:32:00.000+08:00
had OP ytd and its was ok ... i wasnt scared or shivering when presenting... wOoo~ :p hmm... my Q&A oso ok-ok . they asked me 2 question , luckily not 5 like Gan Jun. haha... :D

then went elias mac to eat and steph came my house to play piano. :) *jumpjumpjump in the lift*

finally OP and chinese A level over le. yeah~ dun nid go school le except for stupid netball practises . why have training when no tournament is coming up? irritating~ annoying~ *i'm looking forward to our netball tee~ * :) wOoooo~ blue blue blue!!!! netball netball netball!!! :D :D :D

i think Boy A likesGirl A
Boy A nve know Girl B
i think Girl A likes Boy A
Girl A dunno Girl B
Boy A + Girl A = together

YMX is so BHB!!!!!!!! i cant stand her la.. wow~ irritating! feel like slapping her face. *wahahaha* she state in her blog "all pretty/cute/sexy/hot girls r born on e same date" make me puke!! *vomitvomit* crazy YMX... hahaha~ ronald's going to kill me if he sees this, but he wont. hahaa!

looking forward to 06S208 chalet~~~ !! :D